AresJoxerCupidStrife - Scribe

Part 1 Part 2 - 9 Part 10 - 16 Part 16 - 22 Part 23 -30 Part 31 - 39 Part 40 - 59 Part 60 - 69 Part 70 - 78


Title: Deity by Day
Author: Scribe
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters belong to Rennaissance.
Original characters (such as Impetua and Accord) are copyrighted to
the author.
Sequel/Series: Sequel to Seeking Balance, Part of the Love and
Mischief Series
Summary: Just after Accord is born
Notes: This is one of my Nanowrimo 2004 stories. I intend to
chronicle each day in the first year of Accord's life through a
series of drabbles, snippets, and vignettes. Nothin' but humor,
smarm, and schmoop ahead. :) This starts on April 2nd. I looked
back at the list archive, and that was when I posted the birth of
Accord.
Rating: I probably won't get past an R in the series, but you never
can tell.

Deity by Day, 1/365
by Scribe

(1) April 2

*groan*

"I'm sorry, Joxer."

"Shut up, Ar. You didn't do it on purpose."

"I just wish there was something we could do for the pain."

"Well, there isn't. Not if I'm gonna breast feed--and I AM."

"Are you sure? Apollo said if it's too difficult he can mix up
something and we can use a wineskin..."

"Look, I grew man-boobs, and by golly, they're not just for
decoration. Besides..." *wince* "I'm aching, here. I wish Accord
would go ahead and fuss, so I could feed him."

"I'll get him."

"For Olympus' sake, don't wake him up! We need to take whatever
quiet we can, and..."

*wah!*

Joxer sighed, but he smiled. "And so parenthood begins. Hand me our
son, Ares." Joxer opened his tunic, accepted the baby, and cradled
him gently, guiding his mouth toward a nipple. Accord rooted
briefly, then latched on and started pulling strongly.

Ares sat beside his husband, putting an arm around Joxer's shoulders,
looking down in fascination as his son took his first meal. "What
does that feel like?"

Joxer thought a minute. "Weird. I mean, it's not like I've never
had my nipple sucked, but this is different. WAY different."

"I should hope so." They were quiet for a moment, then Ares said
curiously, "So there isn't anything erotic about it?"

"You mean is it making me horny at all? Mostly I'm just feeling
relief right now. Oops, I think he's finished on this side." Joxer
switched the baby to lie in the crook of his other arm. Accord
happily began to feed from the fresh source. Joxer frowned, rubbing
at the other breast. "Well, they're really sensitive right now..."

"If I remember correctly," Ares drawled, "they've always been rather
sensitive." One finger grazed Joxer's damp nipple.

"Ares? I love you, but if you try anything I'm going to wait till
our baby's asleep, then do my damndest to cripple you." Ares
blinked, then chuckled. "Laugh all you want--I mean it." Ares
nibbled his neck, and Joxer sighed, hitching the now dozy baby in a
little more securely. "For at least the next week." Ares nipped him
gently. "Or maybe the next few days..."




Deity by Day, 2-9/365
by Scribe

(2) April 3

Ares stared down at the naked baby. Accord was lying on his back, legs and arms drawn up close to his body. He was gazing

up, eyes unfocused. Ares knew logically that if the baby saw him at all, it was as a blurred mass, but knowing that didn't

mean that he KNEW it. "I can't do it, Joxer. He's looking at me."

"Tartarus, Ares," sighed Joxer. "I know for a fact that you half-crammed your hand into my wound when the hydra got me."

"This is different."

Joxer studied the worried look on his husband's face, and softened. "Yeah, it is. Hand it over." Ares handed over the wine

soaked cloth. "You know we have to do this to avoid infection. Sure, Accord could probably fight it off, being a god, and

all that, but we don't want him to have to."

"Of course not. But what if he cries?"

"He's GOING to cry sometimes, and not just because he's hungry or wet. We're going to have to deal with it." Joxer squared

his shoulders and turned back to the baby. Accord chose that moment to twitch, little arms and legs straightening briefly.

"I don't think I can do it, either."

"Ace said we have to keep the umbilical stump clean."

Joxer nodded, then got a gleam in his eye. "Let's call him and let HIM do it."

(3) April 4

Ares was cuddling Accord. "Shouldn't he have pooped by now?"

Joxer, sprawled tiredly beside him, grunted. "He's on all liquids." He rubbed his chest, wincing slightly. "Lots of it, so

he's going to pee more than poop. And what poop he has is going to be... Well, you remember what happened the first time I

made you prune whip? Don't worry. If it doesn't happen by tomorrow, we'll take him to Ace and...

Ares had hooked a finger in the back of Accord's diaper and peered inside. "That won't be necessary." He offered the baby

to Joxer.

Joxer stared at him, then took the baby. "You DO know that when you're here, you get the lion's share of diaper duty, since

I have it ALL when I'm alone with the baby?"

Ares smiled at him. "I just thought you'd like to take care of this first one--for your memories."

"Suuuure."

(4) April 5

"No, Ares, I don't think he's lost any hair."

(5) April 6

"Ar, it looks just as thick today as it did yesterday."

(6) April 7

"I swear, Ares. If Psyche wasn't such a bitch, I'd ask her to have a look at you. You're developing a complex about

Accord's hair."

(7) April 8

"Um... okay. I have to admit that his forehead DOES look a good bit higher than it did."

(8) April 9

Strife looked at Joxer, who was gently bouncing a fussy Accord. "A surprise party fah Unc?"

"Well, it IS his birthday on the 15th," said Joxer. He bumped little fingers against Accord's lips, and the baby started to

suck it. "You're not going to get anything out of that--you know that, right?"

"He ain't learned ta be disappointed yet, Joxie. Look, ain't ya still kinda tired? I mean, it's only been a week since

Apollo sorta slit yer belly open and reached inside."

Joxer made a face. "Thank you so much for reminding me."

"My pleasure."

"Yes, I'm still tired. Cord doesn't do much more than sleep and eat, but he usually wants to eat when I need to sleep.

That's why I'm asking you to help with this."

Strife raised an eyebrow. "Help?"

"Okay, so I'm asking you to do it all. I just don't know how I can do it and still keep Ares from finding out. You know how

he hovers these days."

Strife cackled. "It's like ya went from havin a baby attached ta ya ta havin Ares attached. Sure, I'll be happy ta set it

up, but I got a coupla questions. Numbah one, why tha fuss? We don't usually make much of grownup birthdays here on

Olympus. I mean, tha mortal worshipahs like ta pitch shindigs an' lay on tha presents, but a lotta that is along tha lines

of wantin ta be sure we're propahly buttahed up."

"Look, no one ever made much of my birthday when I was mortal, and that's not going to be the case for anyone I care about

now. In fact, I'm going to get a calendar and start noting down birth dates, so that I don't forget anyone, and yes, you're

going on it."

Strife smiled sheepishly. "Kay. An' numbah two, why'd ya ask ME?"

"You mean besides the fact that you're my best friend?" Strife's eyes went wide, but he didn't give any other indication

that Joxer's simple declaration had touched him--he simply nodded. "You're good at planning things. Heck, everyone knows

that you can set up mischief weeks, if not months, or years, ahead of time."

"That I can," said Strife complacently. "But ya gotta admit that I'm not well known fah my party plannin skills. I woulda

thought that Dite would be first choice there. Why not her?"

Joxer smiled softly as Accord worked an arm free of his blanket and waved it, minute fingers flexing. "Strife, do you have

any idea of how many pink baby clothes I have stored away? Even after we KNEW Cord was a boy. She just can't help herself."

Strife giggled. "Yah. I guess tha whole point of havin Unc relax an' enjoy himself would kinda be defeated if he was

surrounded by pink. Too much pastel kinda sets his teeth on edge. Sure, I'll be glad ta do it."

"Thank you so much. Oh," he seemed to recall something, "I should have asked. Are you sure Cupid won't mind? You two ARE

still on your honeymoon."

"Ya kiddin? Ya think Feathahs would miss tha chance to do somethin like this fah his dad? Not likely." Strife stood up.

"I gotta go. I hafta be at Iphicles' palace in ten minutes, or I'll miss my chance ta have tha head chef send in roast pork

at tha state dinner." Strife giggled. "This guy cut off diplomatic relations with a government that presented 'im with a

pair of pigskin gloves." He disappeared, but with no light display. Joxer had noticed that the Mischief God's goings and

comings were a lot less showy around Accord.

Joxer made a face at the baby. "You've got some really terrific relatives, little guy. Of course, some of them are kind of

flaky. Let me tell you about your Uncle Jayce. First off, no--we are not from Spain..."

(9) April 10

Ares braced himself. "I can do this." He dabbed the wine soaked cloth against Accord's tummy. Accord's legs jerked, but he

didn't cry out. Ares felt a wash of relief. "It's scabbed really good now, so I guess it isn't stinging any more. Maybe he

was just startled because the wine was too cool." Ares picked up the baby and held him tenderly. "I'm sorry, Cord. I'll

remember to warm it a little bit next time. You've been such a brave boy, letting Daddy fix your belly boo-boo. Yes, you

has. Whoozza big, bwave boy? Whoozza...?"

Joxer had come to the door, but now he silently turned and sneaked away, grinning, leaving his big, bad, God of War husband

talking baby talk to their son.





Deity by Day, 10-16/365
by Scribe
Summary: A surprise for Ares
Rating: PG

Deity by Day, 10-16/365
by Scribe

(10) April 11

Ares and Joxer lay side by side. Both were looking down at the baby, who was lying between them. Accord was on his tummy,

which Ares took as a favorable sign that the umbilical cord should ready to drop off any time now. Accord's head was turned

to the side, to keep his face from pressing into the mattress. Eyes closed, the baby smacked his lips.

Ares looked over him, at Joxer, and whispered, "What do you think?"

Joxer whispered back. "It's worth a shot. Go for it."

Ares picked Accord up, moving very carefully. He moved so gradually that, had he seen him, Strife would have made some

comment about 'going to slo-mo' (a concept that only he was familiar with. He said it was going to cause a lot of mischief

in the future). Ares swung his legs over the side of the bed, bent, and lowered Accord into the beautifully carved cradle

that sat beside their bed. He settled the baby on the thin pad that Dite had embroidered, and drew the snowy, fleece blanket

that Demeter had sent up around his shoulders.

For a moment he held his breath. The baby wiggled slightly, but his eyes didn't open, and he made no sound. Just as

carefully, Ares laid back down, and pulled Joxer into his arms. He sighed heavily.

*wah*

"Oh, Cerberus," Ares groaned. He started to sit up.

Joxer held onto him. "Wait."

*wah*

"But he's crying," said Ares reasonably.

"He's not hungry, and I doubt that he's wet. That doesn't sound like a painful cry. I think he's just fussy."

"How can you tell?"

"I just can. You'll be able to, after awhile."

*waaaah*

"Joxer, can't we bring him back into the bed just for tonight?"

"Ares, you were there when Ace found out that we'd been letting him sleep with us, weren't you?"

Ares grimaced. "Yes." There weren't too many people who dared scold the God of War. Gaia was one, and Hera was another,

and they did it by mother's right.

"Well, he was right, wasn't he?"

"Yes," Ares admitted. "Having a new baby sleep with two adults IS dangerous. If either of them sleep too soundly, the child

could be smothered. I'd never thought about it, but now that I do, it seems obvious."

Joxer was nodding. "Some circumstances it can be practical--like when you need to share body heat to keep the baby warm, but

we don't have that problem. So he's going to have to learn to sleep in his cradle if we're asleep."

*waaaaaaaaaa-ee* There was a pathetic squeak at the end of the last wail.

Joxer and Ares exchanged looks. Joxer said, "I don't have to go to sleep just yet." Ares reached for the baby.

(11) April 12

"Joxer, I haven't seen anyone lose their hair so fast except when they got scalped during battle."

"Ares!"

"Well, LOOK at him. He had a decent crop of hair when you popped him out, but now... Now you couldn't pluck a hair with

tweezers."

"Don't mention tweezers and my son in the same breath. I've had enough of that with Jayce. Almost all babies lose hair.

Didn't Cupid?"

"Not like this."

"Well, all babies are different." Joxer let Accord wrap his fist around one of his fingers. "We know he's a genius, so

maybe lots of brain activity makes the hair fall out?"

"Are you saying that Cupid is an airhead?"

"Uh..."

"You're so easy. I guess it's just as well he doesn't have a lot of hair. I can easily imagine Dite sneaking over here, and

us finding him wearing a pink bow."

"I don't think even Dite would go that far." Joxer thought. "Now Strife..."

"Quiet! You don't want him catching any random thoughts. He doesn't need any help." Ares rubbed a hand gently over the

baby's head. "You know, he isn't slick. It's sort of like... suede."

"Trust you to find a resemblance to a form of leather."

(12) April 13

"Ares, why do you look so stunned?"

"I think I just got groped by Hestia."

"WHAT?"

"That's what I thought. She dropped by to see Accord while you were napping. By the way, she promised to start working on a

special hard cookie for him to gnaw on when he starts teething. Anyway, when she got ready to leave, she insisted on giving

me a hug. That was odd enough, but... Maybe groped wasn't the right term. Stroked might be more accurate. She ran her

hands all over my back and sides. The really weird part is that she walked away muttering numbers. What's gotten into her?"

"I have no idea."

(13) April 14

"Something is going on. I just hope that Eris and Strife aren't plotting to overthrow me."

Joxer stared at Ares. "I can understand you being paranoid about Athena--she's made it pretty clear that she wants your

job--but not Strife and Eris. They enjoy what they do too much--they wouldn't want the added responsibility."

"I guess you're right. But they ARE up to something, and it's driving me nuts trying to figure out what it is. The last

couple of days they've been whispering and giggling together."

"Giggling?"

"Strife has been giggling, but Eris has been smirking more than usual."

"You worry too much. Here." Joxer handed Accord to Ares. "Take your mind off it."

Ares felt Accord's bottom, then made a face. "Yes, there are few things in the world that can distract you more than

changing a dirty diaper."

(14) April 15

*chorus*: "HAPPY NATAL DAY, ARES!"

*WHAAAAAAAAAAAA!*

"You scared the baby, you idiots!

"Uh-oh."

(15) April 16

Joxer was changing Accord's shirt. "You had us worried there for a minute, Ares."

"Look, I know everyone meant well, but you just don't go yelling like that around a new baby."

Joxer held up his hand, as if taking an oath. "I swear that wasn't my idea. And it wasn't Strife's, either. He was

lobbying for 'Boo'. But Accord settled down quickly."

"And how much did you have to do with that?"

"A little, but what's the point of being the God of Peace if you can't occasionally soothe your own child? I'm going to try

to not do it too often, though." He frowned. "If I did it every time he was upset it would be sort of like drugging him."

"It was a nice party after that. Thanks, Jox."

"You're welcome. I knew I was doing the right thing in getting Strife to organize--he does sneaky so well."

"I was glad to get Hestia's present. It sure took a load off my mind to learn that she wasn't fondling me, but was measuring

me for that new vest. How does she DO that?"







Note: Yes, I already posted part 16, but I've added a little to it, so here's the revised version.

Deity by Day, 16-22/365
by Scribe

(16) April 17

*wah* *wah* *wah* *wah* *wah* *wah* *waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah*

"He just can't settle down," said Joxer.

"Is it colic?" asked Ares.

"Oh, probably not. I talked with Ace about that before I had him--I wanted to be ready for everything. Ace says that it's

not colic unless they cry for more than three hours a day for three or four days a week. It's not nearly that bad. See?

He's quieted down. I'll just put him in the cradle..."

*waaaaaaaah*

(17) April 18

"How long has he been crying this time, Joxer?"

Joxer was bouncing the whimpering baby against his shoulder. He sighed. "I don't know. He started a little after you left

for that meeting."

"But I've been gone for almost six hours."

"Is that all? Seemed longer."

(18) April 19

*patpatrub* *waaah* *patpatrub* *waaah* *patpatrub* *waaah*

"C'mon, baby. You'll feel better if you just get rid of that nasty old air bubble," Joxer coaxed.

"Are you sure that's what he wants?" asked Ares

*waaaah* *patpatrub* "Well, I've changed his diaper and fed him, but he hasn't burped. This couldn't hurt." *patpatrub*

*waaah* "It doesn't seem to be helping much, eith..." *brrup* "There you go, Cord! One more for Daddy." *rubrubrub*

*brrrrrrrrrup*

Ares laughed. "Oh, that was a good one! Yeah, his belly had to hurt with all that gas..."

*wah*

*sigh* *patpatrub...*

(19) April 20

*wah!* *hic* *wah!* *hic* *wah!* *hic* *WAH!*

"Cord, I'm SORRY! I just don't know what to do, since you can't drink water yet!"

*WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!*

"Please, baby..."

(20) April 21

*wah* *wah* *wah* *wah* *wah* *wah*

"Give him to me."

"No, I can do this. I'll have to switch arms, because this one is going to sleep."

"Joxer! Give--him--to--me."

"You're right. I just can't do this."

Ares took the baby. "Stop it. You've done a heroic job so far, Joxer, but you're exhausted, and you're a GOD, for Tartarus

sake! No one--NO ONE--could do a better job of taking care of Accord, but I'm your husband, and you don't HAVE to do it all

alone." He held the baby in the crook of one arm and put the other around Joxer's slumped shoulder. "This isn't a burden

for me, love. I WANT to take care of our baby--and you. Give yourself a break." He kissed Joxer gently. "Go take a nap."

(21) April 22

"I'm going to try something different," said Joxer.

Ares was taking his turn trying to comfort a fussy Accord. He hadn't been having any more success than Joxer did. For the

last few days, Accord was only quiet when he was latched onto the breast, or had fallen asleep--and there didn't seem to be

NEARLY enough time of either. "What's that?"

"His belly button has healed up enough now. Instead of wiping him down, I'm going to actually give him a bath. Maybe the

warm water will make him feel better. I know that it usually works wonders for me, not that I've been able to take the time

to soak in a hot bath recently."

"I told you I'd watch him."

"The last two times I tried he wanted to be fed. I've just resigned myself to nothing but sketchy baths for another month or

so. Let me get the stuff. I'll be right back."

Joxer left the room. Ares lifted the baby off his shoulder, and looked at him. "I love you, but you're wearing your daddy

out, and this is a man who pretty much used to walk all over Greece for a living." Joxer returned, carefully balancing a

basin of water, with cloths draped over his arm. He set the basin on the table, then dipped his elbow in the water. "What

the Tartarus are you doing?"

"I'm testing to make sure the water is the right temperature--not too cold, and not too hot?"

"With your elbow? Thst's kind of like... I don't know... Applauding with the backs of your hands."

"It's something about the skin on your hands can be toughened up by all it's use, so you might misjudge the temperature, but

how often do you use the skin on your elbow?"

"That sounds like something Strife would come up with."

"It does, doesn't it? But actually it was Apollo who told me." Joxer took a deep breath. "Okay, let's try this." He held

out his arms. "Give."

Ares handed over the fussy baby. Accord squirmed, his wailing increasing as Joxer stripped him. "Cord, please don't wiggle

so much," Joxer begged. "I don't really think I'll drop you, but I still haven't quite gotten rid of that

'gods-you're-an-idiot' voice in the back of my head." Accord was not impressed by the request. His thin voice rose,

still-blue eyes squinting to slits, tiny mouth opening wide to show smooth baby gums as he voiced his displeasure with the

world.

Joxer lowered him carefully into the basin, supporting his back and head. The warm water lapped up around the baby's chest.

Accord's rising wail suddenly cut off with a squeak. His eyes opened, and his legs jerked, arms trembling as he drew in a

breath. Joxer and Ares both flinched, prepared for a shriek of outrage.

*coo*

Joxer's eyes had been squinted almost shut in apprehension. Now he opened one cautiously, watching Accord. The baby smacked

his lips, flexing his fingers.

"I don't believe it," Ares whispered.

"If it gets him to be quiet, I'm willing to believe that Zeus has gone celibate." Ares looked at him. "Okay, that was a bit

extreme, but you know what I mean. Do me a favor and reach inside my shirt."

"Um, Jox? Shouldn't we wait till you're not holding the baby?"

"Why? Oh. Not that. Not that I wouldn't be INTERESTED in that, but... I put the soap in my shirt, because I didn't have

enough hands."

"Right."

(22) April 23

"No, Joxer, I'm not trying to tell you how to do your job. It's just that it's been almost two months since any of your

mortal worshippers have seen you, and... well, they get a little insecure. Especially if they're worshipping a new god.

And being told that you're all right just isn't the same as SEEING you."

"That's all very logical. I still don't want to go."

"Yes, you do. You're just worried about leaving Accord."

"Well..."

"Whick is natural. But you're going to have to balance your parenthood with godhood. Now, he's full and clean. Dite is

coming over at any minute. I think between the two of us we can manage."

"Well..."

"It's a couple of hours, Joxer--not forever."

"Maybe one hour. I think I could drop by the temple in Corinth. Xena and Gabrielle might be there. Give Daddy a kiss,

Cord." Joxer rubbed his nose against the baby's cheek. *ah?* "Oooh..."

"No, you don't." Ares took Accord. "Go."

"Okay. The diapers..."

"Are where they've been for the last three weeks. Go."

"One hour."

"Two. Go."

Joxer kissed his cheek. "Yes, sir." He bent and whispered to Accord. "He's awful bossy, but we love him anyway." He

flashed out in subdued wink of silver light.

*wah*

Ares sighed, starting to rock him. Aphrodite appeared sitting on the couch beside him. "You mean you actually got Joxer out

of the house?"

"Accord wasn't crying then. I slapped a block on the place the split second he flashed out, so he wouldn't hear, and come

right back. I'll remove it in a few minutes, once he gets down to earth and gets involved in something. Accord, I just wish

we could figure out what you wanted. You know we'd do anything for you, huh?"

"Let me take him for a minute." Ares handed the baby to Dite. "Shhh. Shhh." She hummed to the child. He didn't stop

crying, but the whimpering died down. After a minute it was no more than an occasional fuss. When she saw Ares looking at

her, she said, "Don't start feeling all inadequate. It's probably nothing more than novelty."

"Cupid wasn't like this, was he?"

"Not nearly, but all babies are different, Ar. I think that this might be partly boredom." When Ares looked skeptical she

said, "Think about it. What can the kid DO right now? He eats, sleeps, poops, and cries. That's it, and it's got to get

old real fast."

"For Joxer's sake, I hope Accord grows into being able to amuse himself quickly. Joxer was almost crying the other day,

Dite. I love my son, but I love my husband, too, and I hate to see him upset."

"Part of it's the after baby blues. Joxer's doing real well. After Psyche had Bliss, she was impossible to live with for

months." Ares started to open his mouth, and Dite said, "Don't say it."

"You're right--it would be too easy."





Title: Deity by Day, April 24-May 1
Author: Scribe
Fandom: X: WP
Pairing:
Rating: R
Summary: Farther along in Accord's first year
Archive: Yes
Feedback: poet77665@catlover.com
Status: WIP
Sequel/Series: Side story to Love and Mischief series
Disclaimer: I did not create the characters here, I don't own them. I derive no profit from this effort. I mean nothing but respect for the creators, owners, and the actors and actresses who portray them.
Websites: http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/scribescribbles and http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/foxluver
Warnings:
Notes: This one is coming in short bursts. I'm hoping that if I post smaller chunks, there'll be more of them.

Deity by Day, April 24-May 1
By Scribe

(23) April 24

"Dad," said Cupid, "it isn't that you're not welcome here, but you left not five minutes ago. I thought you were going to go home and go to bed."

"I was," growled Ares. "I started to sleep on the sofa, but then I decided that wouldn't be far enough away, so I came here."

"I don't understand. Did you and Joxer have a fight?"

"Far from it. We're getting along just fine."

"Then what?"

"You know Accord has been suffering from colic recently, which means that WE have been suffering with him. Well, Apollo told Joxer that sometimes a baby can be soothed by skin-to-skin contact."

"Ooh. You mean--?"

"He's sitting there bare chested, holding out naked son, trying to get him to sleep. Bare chested, Cupid. I had to leave."

"I'll get you a pillow."

(24) April 25

*bouncebounce*

*singing* "He's Ac-cord the Mightier, he's gonna be a wrong-rightier. He'll help others solve their fights with words instead of fists or swords..." *Wait--words and swords are spelled almost the same, but they don't really SOUND the same.*

*coo*

"Oh, you like that one, huh? It still needs a lot of work."

*coo*

"Why, thank you, son. I'm pretty sure that by the time you learn to speak I'll have a good song made up for you. Um... Maybe you don't need to mention this to your Daddy Ares just yet..."

*coo*

(25) April 26

"Are you sure you haven't changed his diet?"

"Ares, do you think I can make different flavored milk come out of my boobs?"

"Well, it has to be SOMETHING. I'm used to his loose poops by now, but DAMN! It's like someone scooped up a pitcher of that really soupy river mud and..."

"Please, Ar, I just got through with morning sickness. I don't really want to upchuck again. Finish cleaning him up, and we'll take him to see Ace."

(26) April 27

Bliss stared at the pot steaming on the portable brazier. "What you cookin', Joxie?"

Joxer tucked Accord into his cradle. "I'm not cooking. I'm boiling water for Accord."

Bliss stared at him, wide-eyed. He squeaked, "You gonna cook ACCORD?"

"What? No! Zeus, Bliss, what would put that sort of idea in your head."

"Chronos ate... Oh, but he swallowed 'em raw." Bliss stared at the steam wafting from the pot and said doubtfully, "I'nt hot for a baff?"

"I'm not going to put Accord in the water, Bliss. I'm boiling it for him to drink."

Bliss gave him another disbelieving look. "You gonna hafta blow on it a loooooong time."

Joxer sighed, sitting on the bed and patting his leg. "C'mere." Bliss trotted over and climbed up on his lap, then snuggled close against him. He'd missed sitting on Joxer's lap while he was pregnant, but if there WASN'T a lap, you couldn't very well sit on it. "I'm boiling the water now, and I'll let it sit till it's cool. Then when Accord is thirsty, but it isn't time for him to eat, I'll give it to him in a skin."

"Okay. Why?"

"Well, according to Ace there are eeny, weeny, teeny-tiny little critters in the water, so little that we can't even see them. Y'see, they're so tiny that they usually don't bother big people, but Accord drank some of them, and it made him a little sick. So if I boil the water it kills the critters, and it's safe for Accord to drink. Understand?" Bliss nodded.

That evening Ares said, "Joxer, what did you say to Bliss today? When Cupid tried to get him to take a bath, he insisted that he boil the water first."

(27) April 28

"...so you see, Bliss," said Joxer, "You don't have to worry about the water in your bathing pool. Understand?"

Bliss nodded vigorously. "Uh-huh. Is there itty, bitty, teeny, weeny, tiny crit'ers in juice?"

"Uh... I don't think so."

"Can I have some juice?"

"Sure." Joxer made a glass of orange juice and handed it to Bliss.

"Do Unca 'Sidon know 'bout the crit'ers?"

Joxer stared at him, then lifted his voice, "Ares, Bliss has a question for you."

(28) April 29

"Rumble, rumble, rumble, rumble."

*coo*

"Rumble, rumble, rumble, rumble.*

*gurgle*

"Rumble..."

Joxer, standing in the doorway, watching Ares as he cradled Accord, said, "Ares, what are you doing?"

"Talking to Accord."

"Rumble?"

"Well, I've noticed that he likes low pitched sounds. When I say 'rumble', it sort of vibrates in my chest, and I'm holding him up against me. He seems to like it."

Joxer came over, embracing Ares, and laying his head on his chest next to Accord. "Say it."

"Rumble."

Joxer kissed him. "You're right--very soothing." Accord waved one arm at him. Joxer took hold of his tiny hand and settled it on his nose. Accord cooed.

"You spoil that child."

"Yeah, like you've never helped him grab your beard."

"We're going to regret that when he gets better motor control."

Accord was flexing his fingers softly, eyes not quite focusing on Joxer's face. Joxer smiled at him, and the baby's face crinkled in an imitation of his expression. "We have time."

(29) April 30

*hic* *wah* *pat* *hic* *wah* *pat* *hic* *wah* *pat* *hic* *wah* *pat* *HIC* *WAAAAH!*

Joxer: "I'm in Tartarus."

Ares: "No. If you were in Tartarus, he'd have loose bowels as well as colic and the hiccups."

Joxer: "I mean I'm in Tartarus because my baby is unhappy and doesn't feel good and I CAN'T HELP HIM!"

Ares: "Joxer, give me the baby."

Joxer: "No, I can do this. I'm his daddy, I'm supposed to be able to make it better."

Ares: "Joxer--give--me--our--child." *Joxer hands over whimpering baby, looking like he wants to cry himself* *very quiet* "I want you to go have a glass of wine and lay down. I'm taking Accord to see someone who's bound to know what to do."

Joxer: *sniff* "Ace?" *Ares shakes his head* "Not Apollo? I mean, he's good, and all, but..."

Ares: "Gaia."

Joxer: *blink* *slow, relieved smile* "Okay."

(30) May 1

Ares woke up and tried to think of what it was that seemed off. Joxer was curled up under the shelter of his arm, snoring softly. Accord was sleeping peacefully in his cradle. After a moment Ares sighed, smiling. *So that's it--it's quiet, and Joxer and I are both relaxed.*

Joxerr yawned, blinked, then glanced up at him, not moving. "Morning."

Ares rubbed his back. "You ought to try to get more sleep while you can."

"I've almost gotten out of the habit. Ar? What did Gaia do yesterday? Accord was so quiet and contented when you brought him back."

Ares shrugged. "She held him. Sang to him. Walked with him."

"I do all those things." Joxer's voice was small.

Ares hugged him, and said quietly, "Jox, there's no accounting for it. What works one time might not work the next. Something that never worked before might suddenly be exactly what it takes."

"But I don't know ANYTHING, and..."

Ares kissed him to shut him up. "This is your first child. No one ever knows anything till they've had a child of their own. Up till then you've been an outside observer. When it's YOUR child--it changes everything. Believe me. Joxer, maybe you haven't had a lot of formal training in the theories of child rearing..." He grunted, "Though it isn't from lack of effort on the account of Dite, Hestia, Ace, and a half-dozen others. Anyway, you have what some new parents don't have."

Joxer squeezed him. "A loving, involved partner?"

"That, too. No, you have the nurturing instinct. You're just good at taking care of little, growing things, Joxer. I can't think of anyone I'd trust more to care for Accord."

There was a soft murmur from the cradle. "Speaking of which." Joxer smiled at Ares. "Snuggles?"

"I was thinking of kicking some military ass this morning. How am I supposed to do that when I'm feeling all warm and gooey from cuddling with you and the baby? Of course, bring him over."

Ares, Joxer, and Accord spent the next half-hour or so snuggling and murmuring to each other in the safe nest of their bed.

The troops that Ares presided over that morning were surprised at the lack of divinely administered casualties.






(31) May 2

"Ares, are you sure about this?" asked Joxer.

"Yeah, I'm sure," said Ares. "We're going to have to introduce them some time or other, and I think now is as good a time as

any."

"If you're sure."

"Are YOU sure?" Joxer was silent. He was sitting on the bed, holding Accord, and now he stroked the baby's head

thoughtfully. "We can wait a little while longer if you aren't. Frankly, I've been waiting for you to ask after him. I

know you've been busy," Ares reached down and tickled the baby under the chin, "And I know how absorbing this little guy is,

but I was surprised that you didn't mention him right afterr you came home."
Joxer looked down. "You were afraid of what I'd say, weren't you?"

"If I didn't ask, you couldn't say no."

Ares touched his shoulder. "Joxer, I know that this is important to you, and I'm not going to make a unilateral

declaration--not without seeing how the situation works out. I'll be back in a minute."

Ares left the room. Joxer cuddled Accord. "You're going to meet someone new today--someone different from anyone you've

ever met before. I sure do hope you two get along good, because he's really a part of this household. He HAS been, and I

hope he still can be. You two have a lot in common, you know. Your Daddy gave him to me. Not the same way he gave YOU to

me, but we won't need to go into that for ten or twelve years." He nuzzled Accord. "You sort of have the same hair, too."

*MEER!*

Joxer looked up as Ares entered the room, carrying a small black cat--a small, SQUIRMING black cat. Ares set it down

quickly, and the cat made a bee-line for Joxer. It leaped up onto the bed, braced its front paws on his leg, glared up into

his face, and started scolding him lustily. "Hi, Mjau. I missed you, too."

(32) May 3

Strife was sprawled on a small sofa in Joxer and Ares' living quarters. Joxer was sitting in a comfortable chair, and Accord

was in a small cradle at his feet. Every time the baby murmured, or shifted, Joxer would give the cradle a few slow, gentle

rocks, and he'd settle down again. Joxer smiled at Strife and said, "Cupid keeping you too tired to sit upright?"

Strife cackled, and shifted over onto his side. "Not like he ain't tryin. But I just figured that I oughta enjoy this as

much as possible, since in a few month's gettin up an' down from a prone position is gonna get kinda tricky."

"Tell me about it." Mjau sauntered into the room, and Joxer called, "Here, kitty."

Mjau ignored him completely. He went to the sofa and levitated, settling on Strife's hip, and starting to work his claws on

the leather. "Hey!" said Strife. "Ya got some nerve, cat." Mjau gave him a disdainful look and continued. "No respect.

Ya hit skin, ya learn how ta fly. Jox, ya got snubbed."

Joxer sighed. "Yeah. He's pissed with me because we were separated for over a month. Man, you should have heard him tell

me off when Ares brought him back yesterday. Since that, he's been ignoring me."

Strife picked up the cat, holding it under its front legs, and dangled it. "Ya snot! Joxie has been good ta yer fuzzy ass.

I'm pretty damn sure he didn't pitch ya out inta tha cold when he had tha baby." He glanced at Joxer. "Bein that cats are

my critters, I know how hard it is ta keep 'em outta any room in tha house if they want in, so ya hadda board him somewhere."

Joxer nodded. "Ares took him to Scribe." He smiled. "I sent her a thank you note, and she wrote back something like with

the horde she had, what difference did one more make?"

*meeyour*

"Ah, shaddup, ya ungrateful beast." He put the cat on the floor. "Make up with Joxie quick, or I'll see to it that every

catnip toy ya have gets mold." Mjau lashed his tail and stalked out of the room. "I tried."

"Don't worry--he'll come around." Joxer sighed. "I hope."

(33) May 4

Joxer finished changing Accord's diaper. "Are you feeling good, punkin? This one hardly stinks at all."

*coo*

"If you say so." He made the messy diaper disappear. "How about I get some of that nice powder Dite sent you? I thought it

was very nice of her to take some of the scent out, once Ares remarked that it smelled like a Cyprian whor--"

*coo*

"Um, house of ill repute." He placed a pillow close on either side of the baby. "Don't move." Joxer went over to a cabinet

on the other side of the room and took upa small jar, one that had a pierced lid. He turned back, and froze.

Mjau was standing on one of the pillows, staring down at the baby. "Oh, Hades," Joxer whispered. He didn't really think

that Mjau would intentionally hurt the baby, not without being provoked, but his instinct was to fly across the room and

snatch the cat up, getting those sharp claws away from the baby's tender skin. But if he frightened Mjau, and the cat landed

on Accord...

Accord must have noticed the cat. He waved his arms and made a questioning sound. Mjau's ears flicked back, and he looked

puzzled. Accord chose that moment to get colic again. *WAH!* Mjau sort of leaned back on his haunches, ears going back

even further, and fur fluffing. But it only fluffed to about half the capacity that Joxer knew he could manage. It was as

if the cat was saying, "Yell at ME? Hey, I can be threatening, too?"

Then, much to Joxer's relief, the cat turned, jumped down, and trotted out of the room. Joxer let out the breath he'd been

holding. He went over to the bed and picked up Accord. He sprinkled the soft, fragrant powder on the baby's chest and began

to massage him gently. Accord was soothed quickly. Joxer said, "Well, that wasn't all I'd hoped for, but it wasn't nearly

as bad as it could have been. I think that as long as you don't try to play tug of war with his tail, or teeth on him, you

should do all right."

(34) May 5

"rowr*

Ares looked down at Mjau. "No. I fed you not three hours ago."

Mjau lashed his tail. *ROWR!*

"I said no. Damn, Scribe must have spoiled you rotten. I swear you've gained a pound since you went over there, and let's

face it--that wouldn't be much on Joxer, but YOU haven't got anywhere for it to go."

*hiss*

"Hiss all you like. I'm not feeding you again--not yet. If you're so desperate for food, go ask Joxer. He's a soft touch."

*hissssss* Mjau turned, jerked his tail high to present his bottom, and stalked out, head down. Ares muttered, "You'll come

around and make up with him, or I'll make a muff out of you, and it's just as well I waited till you left the room to say

that. You'd laugh in my face, because you know damn good and well that I wouldn't do it, because it would upset Joxer. I'll

send you to stay with Gaia. She'll make you hunt mice for a living instead of for sport."

(35) May 6

"Okay, Cord, nap time." Joxer settled the baby in his cradle. "I'm gonna be just down the hall, okay? I'll leave the door

open. All you have to do is yell, and I'll come. Okay? Cord?" Joxer examined the baby, then whispered, "I didn't know you

could blow spit bubbles in your sleep." He tiptoed out.

A few minutes later, Mjau slunk into the room and began to give it a thorough inspection. Before his exile, he'd spent a lot

of his time in this room, but since he'd returned, he'd been avoiding it (the better to punish Joxer). Now he began to make

a tour to see if anything had changed. It was much the same, except that there were a few new objects, and some new, and

interesting, smells.

He found one of Joxer's tunics under the bed and investigated it closely. It was ripe with the familiar, comforting

Joxer-scent, but there was something different, too. There was a distinctly milky scent in one area. Mjau sniffed, then

licked experimentally. Well, that was odd. It was definitely milky-ish, but it wasn't quite cow or goat's milk. He tried

to get a better taste, licking, then chewing the fabric, but there wasn't really enough there to get a good sample, so he

abandoned it.

The milky scent was still in the room, though, and he followed it to one of the new objects. It looked like a box, balanced

on two wooden curves. Mjau liked boxes--they made excellent hiding places. He stood on his hind legs, bracing his front

legs against the side, trying to peer over the edge. The box tilted a little toward him, and he managed to peer over the

top.

There was a little creature not much bigger than he lying in it. It must be the creature's nest, Mjau decided. Mjau

sniffed. Yes, this was where the milk smell was coming from. Since this thing didn't seem to have any equipment for giving

milk, it must have drunk some. *sniff* It smelled like Joxer--a lot. And a little like Ares, too. Had they gotten a new

pet and not told him? Maybe he ought to be offended.

The baby opened his eyes to find bright gold eyes in a dark face peering at him. Accord was in a good mood. He was rested,

dry, not hungry, and his tummy didn't hurt. He decided to be charming. *coo* Mjau's ears flicked back. What on earth?

*coo*

"Prrup?*

*coo*

*murr?*

*gurgle*

*prrrowr?*

*aaaah*

Well, whatever it was, it seemed to be friendly. Mjau looked closer. And it didn't have any teeth, and it's claws were

pitifully short and blunt. This wasn't any threat at all. *sniff* It smelled good, too--and it had a nice, cozy looking

nest...

Joxer didn't have a heart attack when he found Mjau in the cradle with Accord, but he was glad that HE found them, and not

Ares. Mjau was curled up next to the baby, his back nestled firmly against Accord's side, and Accord was sleeping as if

Morpheus had chosen him for special attention. Joxer's laughter woke up Mjau, who immediately leaped out of the cradle and

ran from the room, still not ready to make up.

Joxer couldn't help it--Mjau had been purring in almost exact counterpoint to Accord's tiny snores.


(36) May 7

Ares, carrying a small canvas sack, strode up the steps of the Temple of the House of Intellect. The priest standing door

duty outside swept him a deep bow. "Lord Ares, Lord Apollo is not present today."

"I'm not here to see him. Don't worry, I can find my own way." He shouldered past. The priest had thought about stopping

him, and asking who he wanted to see, so that he could have had him announced. He only thought that for a split second,

though. It wasn't very intelligent to get in the way of the God of War--not unless you were looking for a quick way to

commit suicide.

Asclepius was coming down the hall, and he stopped at the sight of Ares. "Ares! Nothing's wrong with Joxer or the baby?"

"No, I'd have called you to our place if there was. Well, there's nothing PHYSICALLY wrong with either of them, anyway."

"Can I help?"

"No, thanks. I need to speak to Scribe."

He made a face. "Is it important? She's running a seminar for promising erotic writers, and she has a clutch of eager

authors hanging on her every word right now."

"Ace, erotica is in no danger of dying out, and I have an immediate problem. Besides, knowing her, I think she won't mind

the interruption. Is she in her quarters?"

"She's got use of one of the performance chambers." He pointed. "Take the first right turn, and it will be the second room

on the left. And Ar? I'm warning you that if you go walking amongst that lot, you're liable to find yourself featuring

prominently in racy stories for the next few months. I walked in on the last lecture, and within twenty-four hours there

were stories out pairing me with you, Aphrodite, Iphiclese, Caesar, and a REALLY scary one with Jett."

Ares smirked. "I can handle it." Ares followed Ace's directions. It brought him to one of Apollo's smaller performance

chambers. As he stepped in, he saw that someone had rearranged the seats so that they were not ranked in neat lines, as

usual, but were rather placed at tables, all facing the little dais at the front of the room.

There were about two dozen people occupying the chairs, all of them raptly concentrating on the woman seated at a small table

on the dais. "The important thing to remember if you want to write erotica as opposed to pornography is that the story will

have to have all the elements of a 'regular' story. Just describing the characters' physical attributes isn't enough, ladies

and gents. It's all very nice that the woman has large, firm, perfect breasts--incidentally, if you're striving for realism,

think for a moment about how rare that actually is--but if she can't string together more than two words that aren't

'harder', 'faster', or 'oh, baby', she isn't going to hold interest for more than... Oops. Visitor."

Every head swiveled to look at Ares, and there was a low, pervasive intake, then release of breath. Ares suddenly had the

conviction that if mortals were capable of willing action by thought, like the gods, that he'd be standing there naked.

"Scribe, I need to speak to you for a moment."

She consulted an hour glass that was sitting on the table. "It's close to break time, anyway. Okay, people--you have a

half-hour. You'll find chamber pots in that curtained alcove, and I've told the priests to set up wine and nibbles next

door. Don't get too tipsy, and when we resume I'll want each of you to be able to give me a defining NON-PHYSICAL

characteristic for the characters you're constructing. Dismissed." She got up and made her way to Ares. "Let's flash on

over to my place for some privacy." *Flash*

*Flash*

They appeared in the small house that had been set up for Scribe, out in Apollo's garden. Ares took a seat, saying, "I'm

still not sure how you managed to get a place to yourself. I thought you were supposed to lodge with the Muses."

"I'm too damn old to live in a sorority house environment." She shifted a dozing tabby out of a chair and took a seat. "I'm

paying for it, though--one personalized bit of smut a month. I only wish I could have worked out an arrangement like this

with my landlords back on earth. What's up?"

Ares opened the sack. A very fuzzed up, very angry Mjau sprang out and began to swear in cat-language. "Talk to him. He's

breaking Joxer's heart."

"Ahh," said Scribe. "Separation syndrome, huh? I thought you might have a little trouble there. He sulked for a week when

you brought him over. MJAU!" Her voice was sharp. To Ares amusement, the little cat shut up. He fuzzed up even larger,

shoulders hunched, but he shut up. "Come here, you little devil." The cat stalked over to her. She patted her thigh, and

Mjau sprang up to sit in her lap. She leaned down till her nose was almost touching his, and said, slowly and clearly,

"Knock---it---off." Mjau growled in the back of his throat. "You heard me, and you know what I mean." Mjau's ears went

back, but he slumped a little, and the next sound he made was an almost pathetic whine.

Scribe stroked his head. "I told you before--he didn't WANT to send you away--he HAD to. Deep down in your feline heart,

you know very well that Joxer would be miserable without you. What do you think of the baby?" *chirp* "Well, they all

smell like that. I'm sure you came close when you were little. The thing is, Joxer still loves you very much, and it hurts

him when you snub him. If you're not going to start treating him like you used to--well, then you'd better just move out.

Can you think of anyone else you'd rather live with?" There was a series of mews. "I thought not. And no, I'm not offended

that you'd rather be with him. It's to your credit. Are you going to straighten up?" More mews. "Good boy." He hopped

down, and she looked at Ares. "Okay."

"That's it?"

"What did you expect--group therapy? Doesn't work--they egg each other on. He won't be any more obnoxious than he ever was.

But if you and Joxer decide to have another child..."

"We'll have to go through this again?"

She smiled. "Oh, no. Mjau will understand then--but I'm pretty sure Accord will give you fits. Now, would you like a

snack? I need to eat something before starting class again. It's hard to discuss sexy thing when your stomach is rumbling."

(37) May 8

Ares was sitting beside Joxer as his lover nursed their son. Mjau walked into the room, came directly to the sofa, and

hopped up beside Joxer. He sniffed the baby's head, and delicately nibbled a few strands of dandelion fluff hair. "Hey!"

said Ares. "That's just starting to grow back! Don't eat it."

The cat gave him a dirty look, then licked the back of Joxer's hand, and curled into a ball next to him, back pressed against

his thigh. Joxer didn't say anything, but the happy, peaceful look on his face spoke well enough. Ares made a mental note

to order his men to begin training the war dogs NOT to attack cats.

(38) May 9

Salubrius, the Adult Scroll Seller in Athens, noticed a sudden upsurge in Ares-centric erotica. Most of it also featured

either the new Goddess of Erotica, or bed partners who bore a striking resemblance to the individual author who had created

it.

(39) May 10

*wah* *yow!* *wah* *yow!* *wah* *YOW!*

"For Zeus sake, Mjau!" said Ares. "I'm getting his milk skin as quickly as I can! I can't just whip out a boob, like Joxer

does."

*waaaaah* *--YOW!--*

"Here, here!" Ares picked up the wailing baby and eased the tip of the milk skin into his mouth. There was immediate

silence, save for enthusiastic smacking. Satisfied, the cat took up a seat beside Ares to watch the baby eat. Then the cat

glanced up at Ares, and saw his smirk. Mjau bristled, and jumped down, running for the door. Ares yelled after him, "Too

late, you old softy!" Ares looked down at Accord. "He doesn't even make that big a fuss when his own dish is empty."






Title: Deity by Day--May 11 to May 30
Author: Scribe
Fandom: Xean
Pairing: Ares/Joxer
Rating: FRM
Summary: Accord is slowly growing, but Ares and Joxer are getting impatient for *cough*

'quality' time.
Archive: Yes
Feedback: poet77665@catlover.com
Status: WIP
Sequel/Series:
Disclaimer: I did not create the characters here, I don't own them. I derive no profit from

this effort. I mean nothing but respect for the creators, owners, and the actors and

actresses who portray them.
Websites: http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/scribescribbles and

http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/foxluver
Warnings:
Notes:

Deity by Day, May 11 to May 30
by Scribe

(40) May 11

"I have absolutely no problem with you singing to the baby, Ares, but for Zeus' sake, all you

know are war chants, drinking songs, and bawdy ballads. Just learn a couple of lullabies."

"I am NOT singing about rainbows and fluffy lambs."

(41) May 12

Ares: *singing* "Bye, Baby Bunting, daddy's gone a'hunting, to get a little rabbit skin, to

wrap his Baby Bunting in... Well?"

Joxer: "Still a little violent, but okay, I guess. I like the Baby Bunting thing."

Ares: "Don't start. I almost choked on it the first couple of times."

Joxer: "But he LOOKS like a Bunting, doesn't he?" *snuggles baby* "Don't you, Booboo? Where

did you learn it from--Gabrielle?"

Ares: "Please. Strife. He apparently has a full repertoire of songs that appeal to

children."

Joxer: "Yeah, he likes kids. I'm sort of surprised he'd stock up on songs that would calm

and soothe them, though."

Ares: "Oh, he has an even LARGER collection of songs to annoy. There's one he's saving for

the future called 'John Jacob Jingleheimer Smith..."

(42) May 13

Aphrodite bounced Accord in her arms. "Boopity-boopity-boopity." The baby frowned at her.

"Hey, kid--that's my best boopity. There are grown men who would give their back teeth to

have me boopity to them." He yawned. "Well, you're in a fine mood. What's wrong, sugar?

Miss your daddies? They'll be back soon. They just had to make a joint appearance at Daddy

Ares' main temple. They're trying to assure the worshippers that they ARE in harmony with

each other. It's a hard concept for mortals to wrap their minds around, and..." The baby

yawned. "Oh, VERY nice."

From out in the hall, she heard Bliss yelling, "Gran'ma! M'jau is climbing your curtains

again!"

The baby didn't even blink. Aphrodite sighed, and called back, "There's a water skin on the

table. Try to squirt him."

"YAY!"

Dite's eyes widened. "What was I THINKING of? Oh, well. Too late now, and there's nothing

silk in there, so it won't stain. Now, c'mon, kiddo, and give us a smile." Accord frowned.

"Damn, you're a hard audience. Boopity-boopity--boopity..."

Cupid's voice floated to her. "Bliss! What are you DOING?"

Accord yawned again as Bliss said, "Gran'ma said I could."

"MOM?"

Dite raised her voice again. "Yes, I did. Is the cat off the drape?"

"You mean this panel of pink fringe?"

She raised her eyes to the ceiling, then brightened. "Oh, well--another excuse to

redecorate."

Then she heard Cupid call out, "Hi, Dad. How did things go?"

Ares' voice reached her. "Not as tedious as I feared."

Aphrodite's attention was caught when Accord jerked slightly in her arms. The baby's head

started to turn back and forth, as if seeking something. "Oh, my gosh. Accord, that's your

Daddy Ares."

Now Joxer's voice came to them. "Both of our groups of worshippers presented dances. Talk

about a contrast in styles. Mine were white, float, glide, and Ares' were red, leap,

lunge..."

Now Accord was kicking, and jerking his arms. He started making eager, demanding noises.

"And that's your Daddy Joxer." As the two gods entered, Aphrodite said, "Guess what? Your

son can now recognize your voices. Everybody he's heard today has just left him yawning, but

when he heard you two, he snapped to attention."

"Cord!" Joxer took the baby from Dite, cuddling him close. Accord, feeling himself in a

comfortingly familiar embrace, relaxed, and cooed. "Ares, do you know what this means?"

Ares smiled fondly at his son and husband. "It means that now it's going to get harder to

leave him with a babysitter."

(43) May 14

Joxer: "Accord?"

*coo?*

Joxer: "Hey, Accord."

*coo?"

Ares: "Joxer, when are you going to get tired of that?"

(44) May 15

Joxer: "Cord?"

*uh?*

Joxer: "Pretty baby."

*ah?*

Ares: "When are you going to give it a REST?"

(45) May 16

Joxer: "Hey, Accord."

*mmm*

Joxer: "C'mon, Accord."

*mmm*

Joxer: "Cord..."

*WAHHHHH!*

Joxer: "Oops."

Ares: "I tried to tell you. If parents eventually get tired of

'daddydaddydaddydaddydaddydaddy', then a baby is bound to get tired of someone pestering him

constantly for attention."

(46) May 17

Ares was cradling Accord. In a low voice he said, "Joxer, I don't know how to tell you this,

but we need to find a new home for Mjau."

Joxer looked up quickly. "But why, Ares? He always uses his litter box, he hasn't shredded

any upholstery since we got him that scratching post... Well, he hasn't shredded anything

HERE. And he's so good with Accord."

"He has been, but look." Ares carefully touched one of Accord's plump cheeks. "It's small,

and it isn't deep, but that's definitely a scratch."

Joxer suddenly looked relieved. "You're blaming the wrong source, Ar. Mjau is

innocent--Accord did that to himself. Check his nails."

Ares took one of Accord's hands between his thumb and forefinger and examined it carefully.

"Well, I'll be." He kissed the baby's forehead. "Son, you don't need to grow talons. I'll

be happy to provide you with whatever weapons you want when you're old enough." Ares shook

his head. "And I thought Hecate had long nails. I guess I'm going to have to get the feline

a catnip toy to apologize for what I thought."

"He'd appreciate it. The thing is, we have to do something about this, or he'll end up

looking like we've been smacking him in the face with brambles."

"We could just cut them."

"Do you think I'm going to bring a knife anywhere near that child, much less his itty, bitty

fingers? I still get fits of clumsiness, you know, and I don't want our child ending up with

a nickname like 'Nine Finger Accord'."

Ares studied the baby, then his husband. "I don't suppose we could bitr them off for him

till he gets his own teeth?" Joxer stared at him. "That WAS a joke, Joxer. No, I guess

there's only one option."

(47) May 18

Apollo walked slowly into the Muses' room, then threw himself on a comfortable sofa. "Wine,

somebody. My nerves are shot."

One of the Muses brought him a goblet of wine, while another started massaging his temples.

"Rough day?"

"You have no idea. I had to take care of that abscessed tooth Bia had, then I had to give

Mania her annual check up." He shook his head. "How that girl can manage to get ON the

ceiling, I'll never know. Artemis broke her toe during a hunt, and I had to tell her she

needs to stay off it for a few days, which means no hunting, and," he shuddered, "Hera

thought she might be pregnant again. It was only for about ten minutes, but oh, boy..."

"That doesn't sound like a stroll in the park, but you've had worse days," said the Muse.

"I haven't told you the last task of the day." He paused. "I cut a baby's nails." The Muse

snickered. "Go ahead and laugh. The baby was Accord, and I had both the God of Peace and

the God of War standing over me while I did it." He shuddered. "If I'd slipped and nipped

him..."

"Have another glass of wine."

"And I get to do it every few weeks, till he's big enough for them to feel safe doing it

themselves."

"Maybe you should take a few days off."

(48) May 19

*kick* *rake*

"Oh!"

"What is it?" Ares asked.

"Well, I was just kissing Accord's toes," said Joxer, "and he kicked me."

"Square in the nose, eh? That'll make your eyes water."

"No, he hit me in the cheek, and it wasn't the kick so much as it was the toenail. I think

we should have had Apollo do his toenails when we were over there."

"Accord's not going to like that. He kicks like mad every time you touch his feet. I know

he fusses something terrible when I hold them so I can make sure I've washed between his

toes. We're DEFINITELY not going to be cutting them ourselves for awhile. I guess we go see

Apollo again tomorrow."

(49) May 20

Muse: *whispers to her sister* "Why does Apollo look like he wants to cry, or scream, but

can't decide which?"

(50) May 21

Joxer: "You learn something new every day. Asclepius tells me that hair and nails grow for

the same reason--to get rid of old bits of us that our body doesn't need any more. When

there's a little bit inside us that's getting too old, the body makes a new bit, and turns

the old bit into hair or nails."

Ares: "I don't believe it."

Joxer: "Why not?"

Ares: "Okay, maybe I can believe it, but I want to know why Accord's body is shipping

everything to his nails when he NEEDS more hair."


(51) May 22

In Cupid's Temple

*Cupid has his head in Strife's lap* *He is whispering to his husband's still very flat

belly, while Strife rolls his eyes, and strokes Cupid's hair*

*pop of red sparks* *Ares appears* *Cupid sits up to greet him*

Cupid: "Um, Dad? Why is your beard dripping with water and suds?"

Ares: "Because your stepfather nailed me in the face with a fully loaded sponge. He was

reaching for the bar soap, and I figured it might be a good idea for me to come over here

till he settles down."

Strife: *snickers* "Ya try ta grab some nooky in that pool, an' he ain't ready fah it yet?"

Ares: "No. He was bathing Accord. I don't get it. All I did was suggest that he consider

not rubbing Accord's head too much, in order to avoid further hair loss, and... Cupid, pick

your husband up off the floor."

(52) May 23

Ares: "I know why Accord's hair isn't growing in. I caught Mjau licking his head."

Joxer: "Ares..."

Ares: "Joxer, that cat's tongue is like sandpaper. You told me yourself that he uses it as a

comb to remove loose fur--though as much as he sheds it hardly seems likely."

Joxer: "The cat is NOT licking Accord's hair off."

Ares: "So you say, but I'm taking a close look at the next hairball he coughs up."

Joxer: "All right, but be sure to wait till Strife can watch you do it. He'd enjoy it more

than anyone else I can name."

(53) May 24

"Having Bliss over today didn't tire you out?" Ares asked as he and Joxer went to bed.

"Not at all. He played with Mjau in the garden part of the time, with one of the priests

watching," said Joxer. "The rest of the time he played very quietly inside. He's very

considerate when he's around the baby--not loud or rough at all. He spent a good bit of the

time sitting by me, holding Accord. He was a real help, Accord was a little fussy, and he

calmed right down for Bliss. That freed my hands up to go over some petition scrolls."

"That's nice. Bliss doesn't seem jealous of Accord at all."

"I think they're going to be good companions for each other."

"I'm hoping that when he's older, he'll baby sit occasionally."

"Oh, I don't know about that. I'm sure he'll grow responsible enough, but by then he

probably won't want to spend much time with a kid like Accord."

*Somewhere, far away, the Fates start giggling*

(54) May 25

Ares and Joxer were having a late night snack.

"All I'm saying," said Joxer, "is that Demeter is really holding on to her grudge. Why can't

she just forgive and forget? It's been a long time, and Persephone is very much in love with

Hades."

"Joxer," said Ares, "suppose that someone swooped down on Accord and carried him off, and

even if he came to love that person, you were limited on when you could see him, and be with

him, and..."

*crunch*

Ares' eyebrows rose. "I'm glad you were holding a cracker, and not my hand."

(55) May 26

Persephone was on her annual visit to her mother. Demeter looked very perplexed when she

came back from her walk. "What's wrong, Mom?"

"Nothing--nothing at all," Demeter said. "I'm just... Sephie, is it a good sign, or a bad

sign, when you meet the God of Peace, and he gives you a hug for no good reason?"

(56) May 27

"Joxer, you know how much I love you."

"Yes."

"And I'd never try to push you into anything that you didn't really want to do."

"You're considerate like that."

"Smart alec. Accord is almost two months old now."

"Yes."

"So I was wondering if soon you might be ready to..."

"Yes."

"I was just thinking about..."

"I said YES. I've been waiting for you to make a move for a couple of weeks now."

"Really?"

"Well--a month."

"Is Accord asleep?"

"Yes."

*grab* "C'mere, you."

*wah!*

Ares groaned. Joxer sighed, and got up, going to the cradle. "The best form of birth

control in the world--the previous baby."

(57) May 28

"Okay," said Joxer. "He's been fed, bathed, and changed. I played with him till he couldn't

keep his eyes open. I rocked him and sang to him. I put his stuffed centaur in the cradle

with him. We should have at least an hour." *grap* *yelp!* "Ares!"

"Look, an hour is a quickie compared to what I want to do with you. The only time I've ever

gone without sex longer than this was before I started HAVING sex--and I wasn't in love

then."

"You sweet talker. Clothes off..." *flash* "And..."

*whimper*

Both men froze. Ares whispered, "Maybe if we're really quiet..."

*wah* *wah-AH!*

As Joxer got up, Ares growled, "I'm beginning to feel a little sympathy for Tantalus. So

far, just to lose ground..."

(58) May 29

Joxer was studying a scroll as he walked, not really paying any attention to anything else.

The halls were kept uncluttered, the floors were smooth, and he didn't often trip over his

own feet these days. He wasn't expecting anything out of the ordinary.

The hand reaching out of the doorway, grabbing his arm, and jerking him in came as a complete

surprise. The door slammed, and he found himself pinned against the wall by a large, hard

body--one that had... well, a large hard. "My husband will be furious!"

"Whereas I believe MY husband," Ares purred, "Will be very pleased."

Joxer gave a hop, wrapping his legs around Ares' waist. "You got that right."

Clothes disappeared. There was several moments of increasingly sweaty, very pleasant

squirming. When Joxer felt fingers sliding into the crease of his ass, he said, "We don't

have time!"

"Joxer, please..."

"In about ten minutes Accord is going to be screaming his head off to be fed. I'm all for

fast and furious, but THAT would probably cross the border into painful."

"Oh, damn." Ares' arms started to drop.

Joxer's own arms tightened. "Hey, I didn't say NOTHING. Just--not that. Not yet." He

wiggled against Ares. "Move, huh?"

Ares groaned, but contact with Joxer was contact with Joxer. They humped their way to a

sticky climax. Joxer flashed himself clean and dressed just as they heard the faint echo of

the cry of a very hungry baby.

Ares' priests discussed how it was possible for their god to seem simultaneously frustrated,

a little more relaxed, and smug.

(59) May 30

Early that morning there was some activity under the covers of the Ares/Joxer bed. It would

have looked like the same scene in any number of bedrooms, except that every few moments a

head would lift to look warily toward the cradle set near the bed.

There were mutters, sighs, and finally groans. Ares materialized two damp cloths, and handed

one to Joxer. They both silently cleaned their hands, then their bellies and thighs. At

last they snuggled together. Ares whispered, "I don't know it that helped, or made things

worse."

"You didn't like it?" Joxer's voice wasn't quite hurt.

Ares kissed him. "Any time I'm with you is great, love. It's just that this pointed up all

that we haven't been able to have for the last couple of months." He sighed, "And probably

won't be able to get for another month or two."

Joxer hugged him. "As soon as Accord is ready for an over night stay, I promise to screw you

into the next week." Ares raised an eyebrow. "Okay, YOU can screw ME into the next week.

Either way, I'm happy. I just wish that this could have been better for you."

Ares patted Joxer's back. "Joxer, the only thing I would have changed would be having to

stay so quiet. I think I nearly bit through my lip."

"We'll lay a soundproof spell on the room when Accord has his first sleep over."



Title: Deity by Day, 60-69/365
Author: Scribe
Fandom: Xena
Pairing: Ares/Joxer
Rating: FRM
Summary: Accord is growing up a little, but just a little
Archive: Yes
Feedback: poet77665@catlover.com
Status: WIP
Sequel/Series: Part of the Love and Mischief Series, Sequel to Seeking Balance
Disclaimer: I did not create the characters here, I don't own them. I derive no profit from this effort. I mean nothing but respect for the creators,

owners, and the actors and actresses who portray them.
Websites: http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/scribescribbles and http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/foxluver
Warnings:
Notes: Normally this would be longer, but it's the weekend, I'm mega bored, and I don't feel good (don't th ink it's anything major, just a hellacious

case of gas).

(60) June 1

"Ares, look at the baby, would you?"

"Always happy to." Ares peered closely at Accord.

"Well?" asked Joxer.

Ares shrugged. "If anything, he looks even more perfect."

"There's something different about him."

"He looks the same as always to me."

"I can't put my finger on it, but I know it's there. I'll figure it out. No one in the world knows him like I know him."

(61) June 2

"Are you still brooding?" asked Ares.

"I can't help it," said Joxer. "Changes in appearance have to be noted. They might be significant to his health."

"He looks just as fat, pink, and healthy to me as ever. Of course, his hair is still a little thin..."

"Give it a rest."

(62) June 3

"Okay, I've figured out what it is," said Joxer with satisfaction.

"What?" asked Ares.

"I'm not going to tell you."

"Joxer!"

"No. You're his father--you should know these things."

(63) June 4

Ares was studying Accord. "No new moles," he muttered. "All fingernails and toenails intact. Belly button still an innie, not an outie." Accord blew a

spit bubble. "Still the most intelligent infant in creation. Joxer, there IS no difference."

"Is so."

"Tell me!"

"No."

"You're enjoying this. Strife needs to send you a thank you card for the energy this must be giving him."

(64) June 5

"Diaper rash?" *Joxer strips off Accord's diaper, and holds the baby up so that his bare butt is about an inch from Ares nose* "Okay, I'm sorry I

hinted that you might have allowed him to get a rash, but you could have just SAID he didn't have one."

"It wouldn't have been as eloquent."

(65) June 6

"Joxer, unless you want me to have to go to Apollo for an ulcer remedy, you will TELL me what change you've noticed in our son."

"Quitter. Look at his eyes."

"THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH HIS EYES?"

"No! Just LOOK at him, Ares."

Ares checked Accord, and started. "I'll be damned. They're not blue anymore."

"He's decided to have brown eyes."

"Like you." Ares kissed Joxer. "I said the kid was smart." He cuddled his husband. "You know, for a God of Peace, you're pretty good at mental

torture."

(66) June 7

"Here, let me rock the baby," said Ares. "You put your feet up. So, did you have a good visit with Strife?"

"Sure. I'm always happy to see Strife," sighed Joxer, lifting his feet onto a cushion. "I wonder when my ankles are going to stop swelling at the

slightest provocation?"

"What did he want to talk about?"

"What makes you think he specifically wanted to talk about anything?"

Ares snorted. "Oh, come on. Even if Cupid hadn't told me, it would have been obvious. What were you two discussing?"

Joxer gave him a small, secret smile. "Maybe you'll know--some day."

~(Want to know what they talked about? Read chapter one of Tha Birds, an' Tha Bees, an' All That Othah Good Shit)~

(67) June 8

"I think Accord is mellowing out," said Ares.

Joxer gave him an amused look. "He's had colic an awful lot, and I guess that makes him irritable, but why would you think he needs to mellow out?"

"Well," Ares stroked the back of Accord's hand with one fingertip, and the baby's fingers flexed and spread. "See that?"

"Yes?"

"He's spreading his fingers a lot more lately. Up till now, he's kept his fists clenched more than I used to before we were married."

"You're right, but I don't know it it's so much mellowing out as just starting to get better control of his hands."

Ares said decisively, "I say he's getting more even tempered."

*WAH!*

Joxer picked up the baby, saying wryly, "Which would be a good thing for the God of Mediation."

(68) June 9

"Joxer, Accord is too young to start standing up, isn't he?"

"WHAT? Ares, you are NOT trying to get that baby to walk when he's barely two months old."

"No, of course not. Give me some credit, Joxer."

"Well..."

"I mean, he isn't even sitting up yet, so I KNOW..."

"Then why did you ask?"

"The last time I held him up with my hands under his arms, with his feet on the bed, he made stepping motions. And I'm PRETTY sure that I felt him

hold up a little bit of his own weight."

Joxer closed his eyes, then said patiently, "And you aren't going to do that again because...?"

"Because his bones are still soft, and I don't want them to get bent out of shape--I HAVE done this before, you know."

"All right, then."

"Sometimes you sound just like Dite." *smack* "Ow! That wasn't really an insult."

"Call it a last surge of hormone emotions, but no present spouse likes to be reminded too often of the ex."

(69) June 10

"Joxer, watch this." Ares laid his finger against Accord's palm, and the baby immediately curved his hand around it, gripping it firmly.

"Marvelous, but he HAS been doing that for some time," said Joxer.

"I know, but I think we can finally get some use out of his presents. Watch." Ares extracted his finger, then picked up the rattle Hephastus had

given Accord. It was a number of brightly colored wooden disks, strung on a taut cord, and affixed to a handle that was just the right size for a

baby. Ares laid the handle against Accord's palm. Immediately the baby's fist closed around it. When Ares let go, Accord held on.

Joxer clapped. "A new milestone!"

They watched the baby for a moment. "He's just staring at it."

"Ar, he hasn't yet figured out that he can control his hands, and manipulate things with them."

"But if we can teach him to play with it, he'll be able to occupy himself. That might give us some more time for--you know. Maybe he just needs to

be shown. Look, Cord--like this." Ares took hold of Accord's wrist and moved it a couple of times. The disks clacked on the cord. Accord drew in a

sharp breath, staring at the object with fascination. Ares did it again, then let go. "There. You try it, son." Accord stared at the rattle. Ares

sighed.

"You can't expect him to learn the very first time that..."

Accord waved his hand. The disks clacked. Then he lost hold of the rattle, and it bonked him on the nose. He started screaming in annoyance and

surprise. Joxer picked him up and began to try to soothe him. "Yeah, I can see where that's going to be a real help in keeping him amused."




Title: Deity by Day, 70-78/365
Author: Scribe
Fandom: Xena: Warrior Princess
Pairing:
Status: WIP
Series/Sequel: Love and Mischief Series
Summary: Still month two. A new experience, and it's seen that fashion battles
can be generational.
Archive:
Feedback: Yes. On list, or to poet77665@catlover.com
Disclaimer: I did not create and do not own any readily recognizable media
characters. I have no agreement, legal or otherwise, with the creators or
owners. This is purely for entertainment--I have not made, do not seek, and
will not accept any profit for it. This story is in no way meant to reflect on
the lives or life styles of the actors/actresses who originally portrayed the
characters. I have nothing but fond affection and respect for them, for giving
me so much entertainment, and no disrespect is meant by anything herein.
Rating:
Warnings:
Notes: ~Check out chapter 6 of What a Difference a Deity Makes. :)
Personal Websites: http://www.scribescribbles.com and
http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/foxluver (which can be reached through the
previous site).

Deity by Day, 70-/365
by Scribe

(70) June 11

*clackclackclack* *bonk*

"Whaaaa!"

*clackclackclackclackclack* *bonk* The rattle escaped Accord's grasp, falling to
the floor. *thud*

"Look, Accord," said Joxer. "Here's your Pegasus. He's nice and soft. Why
don't you play with him for awhile?"

Accord reached toward the rattle. "WHAAA!" The tone was distinctly demanding.
Joxer sighed and gave in, handing the rattle back to Accord.

"You have to admit," said Ares, "that the kid isn't a quitter."

*clackclackclackclackclackclack* *bonk* *thud* "WHAAAAAA!"

"Or it could just mean that he's stubborn. Wonder who he inherited it from?"

Ares arched an eyebrow. "I think he got it from both sides."

Joxer smiled slightly. "Maybe. I just have a premonition that when he hits the
terrible twos, things may get really interesting."

(71) June 12

Ares held Accord in the crook of one arm. He held Aphrodite's latest gift to
the baby, a tiny sleep robe, in his other hand, and he was thinking, *I will not
hold this like it's a dead rat. Her heart is good, even if she does have crap
fashion sense when it comes to most people she isn't sexually interested in.*
"It's... nice, Dite. Nice and soft." He sighed. *Time to tell her.* "It's
pink."

She nodded happily. "It'll look so sweet with his brown eyes and dark hair."
She frowned slightly. "Well, what hair he has. Some of it IS growing back."

"But it's PINK. Dite, he's a boy."

"I know that, silly. Joxer let me change his diaper once."

"Boys don't wear pink." He hesitated. "Not on a regular basis anyway." He
paused again. "Not unless they're Jayce. I know this is a gift of love, but I
don't want him getting some sort of complex."

Aphrodite put her hands on her hips. "He's not going to just go out and get a
complex on his own, Ar. He'll only have it if YOU give it to him. He's a
baby--he doesn't care WHAT color he wears."

"Dite--look at me." She did. "I love my son, but do you honestly think that
I'd be able to keep from letting my feelings show if he was dressed up like...
like one of the offerings your worshippers give you on Valentine's Day? Babies
his age CAN differentiate between colors--I asked Apollo. And you know from
your personal experience that the color around you can affect your mood. Think
of how good you feel when you're surrounded by pink." She smiled. "But that's
YOU. Now, think of how Eris would feel in the same environment."

Dite gnawed at her lower lip. "Well, pooh. I don't want to make either of you
uncomfortable. Maybe if I made it darker? More primrose than pastel?"

"It would still be pink."

Aprhodite sighed. "White is so hard to keep looking clean, and I'm NOT putting
that baby in black. Yellow or green might make him look jaundiced. Orange or
purple..." She made a face. "Like you said--Jayce. I love the man, but some
of his color combinations... Oh, well. I guess that leaves one choice." She
waved her hand. The sleep robe turned pale blue. "Happy?"

"Thank you, Dite." Ares' tone was heartfelt.

"You're welcome. I have to go now." She started to sparkle. Just before she
disappeared, she waved her hand again, and left a giggle floating on the air
after she was gone.

Suspicious, Ares looked down at the baby garment. It now had white satin ribbon
trim, with a deep lace ruffle around the hem. "Oh, Zeus." He looked down at
Accord, who stared back. "That was your Aunt Dite, Accord. You're going to
love her a lot, but for Olympus sake, don't use her as a fashion consultant."
He hitched the baby up a little higher. "Let's go put this on you. Your other
daddy will probably like it." As he left the room, he said, "I'll try to keep
him from getting a scrying mirror record of you wearing it. There will be
plenty of opportunities to embarrass you when you're a teenager without
resorting to that."

(72) June 13

"Ares," said Joxer, "Quit encouraging Mjau to play with the lace on that sleep
robe. Even if he DOES tear it, try to imagine what it will be like to untangle
it from his claws, because I'M not going to do it, and I'd think that YOU'D
gotten ENOUGH wounds in your life..."

(73) June 14

"Joxer, when Accord starts eating solid food, can I dress him in it for the
first time you try to feed him strained beets or spinach?"

"No."

"But..."

"You know that she'll just take it to Hestia for tips on getting rid of stains."

"I guess you're right."

(74) June 15

Demeter and Hestia were having tea. "Demeter, I wasn't around Ares much when
Cupid or his other children were born. Tell me--does fatherhood make him...
peculiar?"

Demeter stirred honey into her tea, thinking that she needed to see if she could
spread the type of clover that the bees had fed on. It gave the honey a
beautiful flavor. "I'm the wrong person to ask, Hes--I've ALWAYS thought he was
peculiar. What is it that's standing out now?"

"Just something he said to me yesterday. He asked me if I thought that having
every battle for the next decade happen far away from any of my temples might
make me get amnesia about stain removal."

"Hmm." Demeter sipped her tea, thinking, reviewing past incidents in her mind,
then nodded. "Dite gave him something frou-frou, either for himself, or the new
baby."

"How do you know that?"

"Because when Cupid was five and she put him in a pair of lavender shorts, Cupid
managed to turn them into cleaning rags in the course of one unsupervised meal.
Ares was supposed to be 'watching' him." Both of the women burst out laughing.
"I wouldn't be at all surprised if that strategy is passed down..."~

(75) June 16

"Ares," said Joxer. "You haven't been messing with that sleep robe Aphrodite
gave Accord, have you?"

"No," said Ares. "You told me that I couldn't, and I'm not going to risk you
cutting me off, now that we're close to getting back into our sex life."

"Okay. I didn't really think it was you, anyway. If it had been you, the thing
would be a ragged, crusted mess--it wouldn't have another row of lace on it, and
seed pearls worked into the embroidery."

"Damn. I wondered what Dite was doing when she took so long coming back from
the toilet when we had lunch today."

"Ares?"

"Yeah?"

"Isn't one of your war dogs about to whelp?"

"Yeah, my best bitch--and I'm glad that Strife didn't hear me say that. He
probably couldn't resist saying something smart ass, and I can't smack him now
that he's pregnant. Why do you ask?"

Joxer offered the fancy sleep robe. "Could she use something soft for her bed?"

"Too much even for you?"

"I've gotten a high tolerance, what with being related to Jayce, but everyone
has their limit."


(76) June 17

"...so you see, Dite," said Ares, "I couldn't very well put the gown on Accord
after Stitch had a litter of puppies on it." He had his hands clasped behind
his back, and now he crossed two fingers. "I was letting her roam around our
quarters, since she was feeling restless with her labor approaching, but I don't
know HOW she got hold of it."

Aphrodite looked disappointed. "Oh, and I SO wanted to see him wearing it at
his official presentation in your temple."

*Over my dead body,* thought Ares.

Aphrodite perked up. "Now I'll just have to design something else for him! See
ya later, Ar. I have to go look at swatches."

Ares managed to keep from dropping his head into his hands till after she left.

(77) June 18

Joxer patted Ares' back. "I know how Dite's attempts to provide Accord with an
androgenous wardrobe affects you, but hon--you've GOT to stop grating your
teeth..."

"It's going to be pink. I know it is. Even if she brings him chain mail,
she'll find a way to make it pink."

(78) June 19

Aphrodite sparkled into the temple, and Ares and Joxer looked up--Ares with
apprehension, and Joxer with resignation. They'd already discussed it, and had
agreed that whatever--WHATEVER--Dite brought Accord, the baby would have to wear
it for at least one public showing. "Hi!" Aphrodite carolled. She bounced over
to them and offered a bundle of pink cloth. "For the bay-bee!"

Ares took Accord from his husband. "You take it, Joxer." Mentally, he told
him, *-I- can't. I just hope I can keep a straight face, and not wince.*

Joxer accepted the object. He even managed to look pleased. Ares wondered why
the Freaky Foursome had considered Joxer socially inept--the God of Peace was a
master at avoiding hurting someone else's feelings. "Thank you, Dite. My, what
a pretty shade."

Dite wiggled. "Open it."

Joxer's expression went blank, and he exchanged a look with Ares. "Open it?"

"That's just the wrapping, silly. Open it."

Joxer unfolded the peice of pink fabric. Inside was another tiny sleep robe.
This one was of maroon silk, with a geometric design worked in black thread
around the hem and down the sleeves. As the two men tried not to gape, she
said, "I thought that those colors would look... I dunno... Sort of judicious?
Anyway, not girlie, but not totally grim, either. And those colors go good with
his hair and eyes, too. What do you think?"

"What do I think?" said Ares quietly. Joxer watched him warily. Ares held out
his hand to Joxer. "Give me that. I want to see what it looks like on him.
He'll get a chance to choose the colors of his official robes when he gets
older, but personally, I think I'm going to lobby him to pick this combination."



tbc

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