Title: I’m Sorry
Author: Shadowgrl
Fandom: Xena: Warrior Princess
Pairing: Cupid/Strife, Ares/Joxer
Rating: NC-17
Archive: my site, RCOS, AJCS, Joxerotica, strife_lust
Warnings: Slash fic
Third in series, sequel to
Uh-oh Strife murmured sleepily to himself as he woke up. Looking around, he blinked in confusion. Where was he? Had he gotten drunk last night and redecorated his temple? And if he had, why in the name of Tartarus had he picked the color blue?
Strife shifted around in the huge bed. His body slid across navy blue satin sheets and that feeling brought back memories of the night before. And with those memories he remembered where he was.
Cupid’s temple.
Where a furious Cupid had taken him to “straighten things out” between them after hearing him joking around with Joxer about the two of them hooking up. Strife wasn’t too sure how much straightening had gotten accomplished, but he was dead certain he’d never been so well fucked in his entire life. Cupid had, to put it bluntly, nailed him to the mattress. Strife couldn't even begin to count how many times Cupid had fucked him, but the biggest surprise had come when he’d let Strife dominate. Strife shivered as he remembered the feel of Cupid around him. Tight, scorching, and oh so wanting. Strife smiled. Yep, last night had definitely been the best night of his life.
Swinging himself out of bed, Strife clothed himself with a thought. He decided to go find his missing lover and see how he was. Then he’d better check on Joxer. Just to make sure that he got through the night unscathed.
Sauntering through the temple, Strife mentally cringed and shuddered at the incredibly gaudy decorations. How Cupid could live in this was beyond him. Maybe he ought to get him a gift to liven the place up a bit. Strife brightened at the thought. A few swords, some daggers, a mural of some famous battles and the place would be livable. Hearing voices, Strife turned down a small hallway. He picked out the voices as Cupid and Aphrodite. Strife hesitated. ‘Dite knew about the arrow, of course, but she probably didn’t know about the fucking part. Maybe he shouldn’t go in. About to go back to bed, Strife stopped when he heard his name. Curious, maybe Cupid had told her he was here after all, he decided to move forward. But he stayed hidden behind some large, and incredibly tacky, statues.
“So, everything’s working then?” Strife heard Aphrodite ask.
“Yeah, everything’s great, Mom. I got Strife right where I want him. This fake arrow thing was a great idea. He never knew what hit him.”
Cupid and ‘Dite were laughing and talking but Strife tuned the conversation out. A fake arrow. It wasn’t real. None of it. Cupid had planned the entire thing. All the longing glances Strife had ignored because it wouldn’t be right to take advantage of Cupid when he was under a spell. All the seemingly innocent touches. Even the fight when Cupid had gotten hit was staged.
Strife felt odd. Opening his eyes he realized that everything was kinda. . .floaty around him. Disconnected. He could still hear their voices in the background, but he couldn’t really make out what they were saying. His thoughts narrowed in on one thing. It had been a setup. He wasn’t supposed to be here, in this temple. Cupid had tricked him. Once, long ago, Cupid had been the God of Love and Mischief. Mischief had been taken away because he had caused too much trouble. I shoulda remembered that, Strife thought. He’s a better God of Mischief than I am. He even fooled me.
Glancing around he discovered he’d made it back to Cupid’s bedroom. The one they’d had sex in all night long. The one where the final act of the farce had played out. Because, of course, it was over now. Cupid had gotten everything out of him that he’d wanted. He’d managed to humiliate and hurt Strife. And Strife had learned a lesson. Never again would he mess with anything of the Love God’s. In fact, never again, would he voluntarily go near either of them. Cupid had gotten everything from Strife. Even the one thing Strife had never even realized he could give. Cupid had gotten Strife’s love.
With a quiet howl filled with anguish and betrayal, Strife vanished.
He reappeared in his temple where he proceeded to barricade the doors with power shields. No one would be able to get in unless Strife let in and he wasn’t about to take those shields down for anything. He needed to regroup. No doubt Cupid would be looking for him for the final stage of his plan; the laughing “you thought I cared about you” jeer. Strife needed to be prepared for that. He was broken anyway, he would let Cupid have the final say. It made no difference to him anymore.
Strife scuttled into his bedroom and closed the door. Leaping into bed he pulled his stuffed cat out from under his pillow. Curling into a tight ball, Strife pulled the covers over his head and buried his face in the pillow. Regroup. He needed to regroup. Tears of heartbreak and misery streamed down his face.
Cupid and Aphrodite were lounging in the front room waiting for Strife to wake up when they felt it. The sheer pain radiating from the heartbreak was enough to make Cupid groan and Aphrodite went pale. Quickly, she concentrated her powers and sent her mind out looking for the person whose heart had just been shattered. She was met with a block that not only stopped her from accessing the person, but was also filled with such misery that it made her nauseous. Sensing his mom’s difficulty, Cupid leapt in and added his powers to her own. Together they were able to squeeze past the block for a few seconds before it slammed down on them and kicked them out, violently. After they recovered from the unceremonious reception they looked at each other. They had only been able to get in for a few seconds, but it had been long enough.
Cupid didn’t think he’d ever forget the sheer misery radiating off his beloved Strife. His beautiful Strife, who had overheard the conversation he had been having with his mom and had thought the entire thing had been a prank. His Strife, whose heart had been ripped to shreds by him, Cupid, the God of Love himself.
Desperate to explain, Cupid flashed himself to Strife’s bedchambers. Or he tried to. He no sooner approached Strife’s temple then he was sent back to his own again where he landed in a heap right back where he’d been. Strife had blocked his entire temple off. No God or Goddess could flash in. All right, Cupid thought. I’ll walk over.
Aphrodite blinked in astonishment as Cupid suddenly landed hard in the middle of the room. She had no need to ask what had happened. Strife had apparently blocked his temples so no one could get in. Cupid would have to walk over, but maybe Strife should have some time to cool off first. He could be dangerous when provoked and there was no question that he had been provoked. If it came down to it, Cupid would let Strife hurt him until he felt better and that could not be allowed to happen. It would break both Cupid and Strife. She quickly grabbed Cupid’s arm as he stood up, a look of determination on his face.
“Cupid, honey, maybe you should wait. Give him time to calm down, to think about things and realize you wouldn’t hurt him like that.”
“But he won’t, Mom. If I don’t go now I’ll never get another chance. He’s blocked his temples and now he’s working on his heart. I know him, Mom. If I don’t explain things to him right now, even if I get another chance and he believes me, he won’t risk letting me in again. I know he’s angry and hurt, but I caused that and I have to fix it, no matter what.”
Aphrodite looked closely at her son. There was no way he was not going. “Talk to your dad first, please, sweetie. He knows Strife, he’s seen Strife angry and you have to admit you haven’t. He’ll know the best way for you to approach Strife.”
That was true, Cupid mused. Dad does know Strife and how he reacts when upset. And maybe he’ll have some advice. Cupid nodded to his mom and flashed out reappearing in Ares temple hoping the whole time that this delay wouldn’t be long enough to cost him Strife.
Ares was, for a change, in a good mood. And it was all because of the mortal sleeping next to him. Last night had been devoted to showing Joxer just how good he could be as a lover and as holder of Joxer’s heart. Ares had a feeling that it had worked. Of course, he would have to confess to Joxer soon. He couldn’t lead him on, that would be bad. He had learned from Zeus and Hera. It was best to be honest with your spouse. Well, Joxer didn’t know about that part yet, but Ares felt that the honesty still applied to one’s future spouse.
But Joxer was still sleeping and there was no real need to wake him up just yet. Ares decided to go take care of some work before Joxer awoke. If it was done fast, he could be back to say good morning to Joxer and then drag him right back to bed. But his plans were derailed by the thoroughly terrified son he found sitting in his throne room.
Cupid saw Ares enter the room and flew over to him, rambling hysterically. After recovering from almost being hit in the face by a flying Love God, Ares tried to make sense of his son’s ravings only to find that he couldn’t. Forcibly sitting Cupid down, he gave him a glass of wine and made him drink it. After Cupid had gotten his breath back, he started to explain.
Ares’ face grew darker and darker as he listened to the entire plan Cupid had laid out all those weeks ago when Strife had first played the prank on Cupid. But at the same time, he was aware that what he was doing with Joxer was really no different. Joxer and Strife were a lot alike in their insecurities. Neither one thought they were worth anything and neither of them thought they would ever find someone to love them. And if Strife had reacted like this, Ares was afraid to know how Joxer would react. But if Strife listened to Cupid and accepted that it hadn’t been a cruel trick, then maybe, if Joxer reacted badly, Strife and Cupid would help Ares explain to Joxer. With that in mind, along with a sincere desire to help his son and nephew, Ares told Cupid what he could expect from Strife.
It would not be pretty. Strife was generally pretty easy-going; not much fazed him. But this messed around with people’s feelings, something Strife had always been careful not to do. He might take advantage of a couple’s marital spat, but he would never manipulate them into having one. It wasn’t his style. And now he had been manipulated into these feelings for Cupid and then betrayed. Strife, as soon as he forced his emotions down far enough, would be out for blood. More specifically, he would be out for Cupid’s blood. And as strong and smart as his son was, Ares knew that he was no match for a cunning, devious, furious God of Mischief.
It said a lot to Ares that when he told Cupid he could expect to be hunted like one of Artemis’s deer, Cupid appeared neither scared or worried.
“I’m hoping it won’t come to that, Dad. I tried getting in but he’s blocked his temple. Do you know of another way in? If Strife wants to beat me up I’ll let him, but I would rather not let him get into that state. But there isn’t much I can do from out here.”
Ares thought. He knew several ways into Strife’s temple but they were probably blocked. He quickly reached out his thoughts and did a quick scan. Yep, all blocked. Strife had been very thorough. He obviously did not want to be bothered.
Cupid nodded when he heard that. There was no choice for it then. He got up and began to walk out of the temple. But before he went he decided to give his father some advice.
“Dad, if I were you, I would tell Joxer the truth. He might not have powers like Strife does, but he’ll still be hurt and upset. Tell him quickly before he finds out and misunderstands like Strife has.”
“How did you know?” Ares questioned his son. He’d thought he had kept it so well hidden. Not even Xena had figured it out and she knew him better than most.
Cupid smiled sadly at him. “Hello, God of Love here. I might not be too smart about my own heart, but I know about others. Tell mom I’m at Strife’s.”
“How are you going to get in?”
“I’m not. I’m going to sit out there and wait for him to come get me. If I can’t help him understand at least I can give him the closure he’ll need.”
Ares nodded. That was a dangerous plan and ‘Dite would have his head for allowing it, but he could see in Cupid’s eyes that nothing was going to stop him from going forward with it. Ares mentally cringed. He wouldn’t want to be in Cupid’s shoes when Strife finally regained control of his emotions. Cupid was in for a lot of pain, both physical and emotional. Strife would use every weapon he’d ever learned to hurt Cupid and Strife knew of a lot of weapons.
Strife knew immediately when Cupid sat down outside his front door. Just as he’d known when Cupid tried to transport in. He expected Cupid to start pounding the door and yelling, but instead he just sat there, leaning against the door, a blank look on his face. Not entirely sure what he was doing there and not ready to talk to him, Strife decided to leave him there. He’d go away soon enough, Strife figured. But Cupid’s presence there brought back the previous nights events. In vivid detail.
It was difficult to ignore them. The memories had been welling up since he stopped crying. They were telling him that Cupid would never have been so upset about his comment to Joxer if Cupid didn’t care about him. They showed him the soft, almost reverent way Cupid had stroked him. They reminded him that Cupid had pulled him in to lie against before he drifted off to sleep. They tried to contradict the conversation he’d accidentally walked in on.
Should he listen? No! Cupid had hurt him and he would pay for that. But he’d never be able to concentrate on teaching him a lesson if he kept getting interrupted by these damn emotions and thoughts. Maybe he should put them to rest once and for all. Yeah, he would relive the night over again and then reconcile those images with Cupid and Aphrodite’s conversation. Then he would be ready to punish Cupid. He would be ready to let go.
/////
Strife was nervous. All right, he was scared. Cupid was definitely furious and Strife was regretting not listening to Aphrodite when she offered to give him tips on how to handle Cupid when he got jealous. He’d thought he wouldn’t need them, that Cupid would be fine. He’d obviously thought wrong because he was now faced with a thoroughly furious and jealous God of Love.
Strife and Joxer remained frozen as both Cupid and Ares stalked towards them. With his wings extended to almost full span, his fists clenching, eyes flashing and a high color in his face, Strife was hard-pressed to keep from drooling at the sight of the Love God. Tartarus, he was gorgeous when angry. Cupid stopped about ten feet from him and his eyes caught Strife. They sucked him in and the fact that he was standing in Ares’ temple with Joxer by his side faded away. All he could see were those eyes. Cupid stretched out a hand and, in a daze, Strife felt himself move forward and take it. He was instantly pulled forward where he landed against Cupid’s chest with a small oomph sound. Cupid wasted no time and immediately transported them back to his temple.
Strife landed on the bed with a yelp and looked up to see Cupid glaring down at him. He froze. This sort of thing had never happened to Strife before and he honestly had no idea what to do. Seeing the bulge between Cupid’s legs he knew he had to stop Cupid before he did something he would regret after the arrow wore off. Unfortunately, it was hard to focus on a way to stop Cupid when all Strife wanted to do was yield himself to his blonde cousin.
Strife stared up at his cousin, the look on his face totally giving away his surprise. For a moment Cupid seemed to hesitate. But as Strife opened his mouth to say something, Cupid moved. Before Strife could even get the first syllable of the protest he really didn’t want to make out of his mouth, he found his mouth occupied by Cupid’s. Cupid’s tongue plunged deeply into Strife’s mouth, using the element of surprise; he was able to coax Strife’s tongue into play before he even realized he was being kissed. For a few moments Cupid reveled in the kiss before Strife pushed him away. Being heavier and stronger though, Cupid didn’t really go anywhere, he simply continued laying on Strife, making sure that his body lined up completely with Strife’s. Fighting the grin that threatened to break free, Cupid listened in amusement as his big, bad cousin babbled frantically all the reasons why this wasn’t a good idea. The first one being the fact that it was all because of the arrow. Cupid thought about telling Strife the truth then, and he probably would have, except Strife, never one to be accused of being patient, arched his body up in an attempt to throw Cupid off. That movement rubbed his entire body along Cupid’s and twin groans issued from their mouths. Cupid looked down on his cousin, all thoughts of the truth gone and thoughts of that lean, strong body writhing in pleasure under him taking their place. Strife didn’t even have time to gasp as Cupid once again devoured his mouth.
Things moved quickly after that. Neither one could hold back their desire any longer and even as Cupid’s hands moved to caress Strife’s chest, Strife’s hands moved down to cup Cupid’s ass. Slowly, they ground their bodies together, cries and moans of pleasure thrilling each of them. But the clothing became too much of a barrier and it had to go. Ignoring the ability to banish it with a thought, Cupid reared back and ripped Strife’s leather suit from his body. He would have ignored the pout this produced except Strife’s lower lip stuck out and Cupid was seized with an uncontrollable urge to suck on it. So he did.
The leather top was gone but the bottoms remained and before Cupid could ruin those too, Strife wriggled out of them. He still wasn’t sure if he was doing the right thing, but desire had beaten common sense down into the ground and he ignored the little tremor that went through him as his eyes met Cupid’s. With a wicked grin, Cupid removed his own clothes, what little there was of them, since he wore no shirt because of the wings.
They twined themselves together on the bed; their nakedness only heightening the pleasure they had felt previously. Hands wandered and mouths kissed. But the wanting had been going on for too long and gentleness was forgotten in the desire that ripped through them. Cupid growled low in his throat and Strife heard it for the gesture of dominance that it was. He immediately stilled. Slowly, Cupid reached down and grasped Strife’s cock in one hand. He sent the other hand on an adventure of Strife’s chest. Gently tweaking the nipples, alternating between one and the other, his other hand set up a sliding motion, occasionally twisting slightly for a new angle on the hard and leaking cock.
Strife’s body was no longer under his control. Cupid held the reins to it and he kept Strife bucking and wriggling in a frenzy of want. At last though, just when Strife thought he would die, Cupid moved up and pressed his mouth to his in a butterfly kiss. A pot of oil appeared next to them and Strife knew this was it.
He realized that everything that had happened since he played the trick on Cupid had led up to this moment. This was the only way it could end. Cupid had given up control of his emotions to Strife now Strife would give up control of his body to Cupid. He had taken, now he would receive. His eyes watched as Cupid dipped one finger in the oil and then moved to him. Cupid gently inserted the finger, going slowly, but Strife couldn’t help the small wince that escaped. Like Ares, Strife rarely allowed anyone to dominate him this way; he was always the one on top. It had been a long time since he had been in this position and it was something he had to get used to again. Cupid moved his finger in and out very slowly and Strife’s body accepted it. He barely even noticed when a second finger was added.
The third finger caused a howl of pleasure to escape from Strife as it brushed that little spot inside him. He began to move on the fingers, wanting more of the pleasure, but knowing he needed more inside him as well. Despite the desire for more to fill him, Strife couldn’t hold back the whimper when Cupid slipped his fingers out and it was all Strife could do to keep from thrashing around as he watched Cupid liberally coat his cock with oil.
But at last, Cupid positioned himself, the head of his cock just touching the small pucker that would lead him inside his beloved. Slowly he began to move in, but Strife was having none of that. Desire forced him to clench around Cupid and try to thrust up for more. The whimpers, thrusts and wriggling broke Cupid’s control and he thrust in the rest of the way, accompanied by Strife’s scream of his name.
Not giving either of them time to adjust, Cupid began a rapid pounding, being careful to hit Strife’s prostate every time. It quickly became too much and with a final thrust Cupid came deep inside his lover. He pulled out and immediately engulfed Strife’s cock in his mouth. Strife bucked up with a wild cry and let loose, his seed spurting out and down Cupid’s willing throat. Exhausted, and still a little shocked, Strife made no protest when Cupid moved up his body and thrust himself back in. “Sleep now, Strife,” he whispered. “Just making sure you can’t go anywhere.” And with that, Cupid had nuzzled into him and fallen asleep. Strife had lain there in shock for a few moments; he’d never had a bed partner use this position to keep him around longer. It was disconcerting, but it felt good as well. Not just the semi-hard cock inside him, but the emotions as well. Cupid wanted him to stay here, which was something new for the godling. He sighed softly. He was gonna get in trouble with ‘Dite and Ares for sure after they found out he’d slept with Cupid, but it was definitely worth it. Too bad it would only be this one time.
But it wasn’t only that one time. Strife had wakened to the incredible sensation of Cupid moving inside of him. Opening his eyes, he was met by the sight of a solemn Cupid gazing into his eyes even as his body moved against Strife’s. It had felt so good. And the experience had been repeated over and over again through the night.
They had fallen asleep as the dawn began, having spent the entire night loving each other. For once, Strife had slept deeply, untroubled by nightmares or the inability to completely relax and let sleep claim him. It was the first good night’s sleep he’d had in weeks.
////
As Strife surfaced from the memories he felt the tears dripping off his face. Gently he wiped them away. He called up a scrying mirror and saw that Cupid was still sitting there, it looked like he hadn’t even moved. Strife sighed. The memories hadn’t done what he’d wanted them too. If anything, they had done the opposite. He’d wanted to become even angrier with Cupid so he would have the strength to hurt him the way he had hurt Strife. But all he had now was an empty, hollow feeling inside him. The anger and desire to hurt was gone. The love was still there though. And it probably would be for a while.
Giving up on his plans for vengeance, but still not ready to talk to Cupid, Strife flashed to his uncle’s temple. He wanted to check on Joxer. He hoped Joxer’s morning had gone better than his had. Not that it would be difficult for anyone’s morning to be better than his had been.
Popping into Ares temple, Strife looked around. There was no one there. Shrugging a little, Strife decided to go look for his uncle and “The Mighty One.” Not expecting them to be there, but at the same time not sure if they would be, he crept down the hall to the bedroom and slowly opened the door. He was hard pressed not to laugh at the sight that met his eyes. It was definitely a pick-me-up. Joxer was asleep on the bed, all splayed out in a position that just screamed he’d fallen asleep after having sex. Hovering over him with the sappiest expression he’d even seen on him, was his uncle Ares. Strife’s little snicker drew Ares’ attention and he quickly crossed the room and pulled Strife out the door. Closing it softly, he looked at his nephew.
Strife looked… haggard. He was paler than usual, the slightly insane glint his eyes usually had was gone, and there was no smile present. On the left side of his face was a pillow imprint and dried tear tracks ran down his face. But he managed a shaky smile for his uncle and Ares immediately knew something had happened.
Wrapping an arm around Strife’s shoulders he guided the young god to his throne room where they sat down; Ares in the throne and Strife curled up on his lap.
“Okay, what did you do?”
Strife looked confused. “What do you mean, what did I do? I didn’t do nothin’”
“Strife, Cupid came to see me. He told me everything and I know he went to see you so he could explain to you. Now, last time I checked, your temple was blocked and you were furious. Now, you’re here and you seem to be fine, although I’ve never seen you so quiet.”
Strife shrugged his shoulders. “I’m just tired. It’s not every day I get screwed over by the Love God, after all.” He tried making a joke out of it and knew he’d failed miserably when Ares grip around him tightened.
“Strife,” Ares said in a warning tone.
Strife snuggled into Ares neck. Sometimes his uncle could be a real prick, like when the battle lust took over him and he had to get rid of it and chose fucking Strife to do it, but most of the time he was cool. He was the only one Strife could tell the truth too. “I’m just tired Unc’. That’s all. I wanted to hurt Cupid like he hurt me, but now I just want to forget. Forget the entire thing ever happened; forget Cupid and Aphrodite even exist. I saw him at my temple, but I just left. I don’t wanna talk to him. I’ve got nothing to say to him.”
“He has things to say to you,” Ares murmured.
“Then he shoulda said them before.” Strife yawned. He was so tired. Bein’ emotional took a lot out of a God. He’d have to remember not to do it again. He moved deeper into Ares’ lap. Breathing softly, he lulled himself to sleep with the rhythm of Ares heartbeat. Yeah, his uncle was pretty cool for an old guy.
Ares silently snuggled his nephew and waged an internal debate. Cupid and Strife could be good together, but not if Strife wouldn’t listen to Cupid. On the other hand, if Ares called Cupid now, Strife would feel betrayed by him and it could ruin their own relationship. He wasn’t sure what to do.
A movement distracted him and Ares looked up to see Joxer walking towards him. He groaned to himself as he realized Strife’s position implied a lot of things, all of them sexual. He hoped Joxer didn’t get the wrong idea.
Joxer casually walked up the steps leading to Ares throne. Perching himself on the arm, he whispered hello, being careful not to wake Strife up.
“Is he okay?” Joxer asked, nodding towards Strife.
Although surprised at Joxer’s lack of reaction, Ares nodded. “He’s had a rough morning. I think he’ll be okay though. I hope.”
“What happened?” Joxer asked.
Debating internally, Ares decided to tell Joxer the truth. “It’s kind of a long story. Do you promise to say till it’s over?”
Joxer nodded. Curiosity had always been a fault and maybe he could help Strife out. Sometimes the Gods needed a mortal’s perspective on things.
Ares took a deep breath and silently prayed things would work out. He wasn’t sure whom he was praying too, but it didn’t matter. “You remember Strife said Cupid had been hit with one of his love arrows and that he was now in love with Strife, right?”
Joxer nodded. So the story went back a few weeks, he thought.
“Well, it turned out to be fake. It was all part of a plan Cupid had cooked up to get back at Strife for a prank he pulled earlier. Only there was more to it than that. See Cupid’s been in love with Strife for years, but he never approached him. So when Strife played his trick, Cupid saw it as an opportunity to get closer to him. So he came up with the fake arrow. The arrow wasn’t a real love arrow, Cupid just pretended it was. So he got to spend time with Strife and Strife got used to someone caring about him.
But Strife refused to take advantage of Cupid while he was under the supposed spell, so last night, Cupid seduced him. Then this, morning when Strife woke up, he heard Cupid and ‘Dite talking about how the fake arrow was a great plan. Naturally, he thought the whole thing had been fake and he left. Cupid’s been trying to talk to him all morning and tell him the truth, but Strife had his shields up and he couldn’t get through.
So now he’s here. And I don’t know if I should tell Cupid he’s here or if I should let Strife pick his own time to talk to Cupid.” Ares sighed as he finished. It was definitely a mess.
“Would he talk to Cupid?” Joxer asked.
“I’m sure he will. Unfortunately, by the time he does he’ll have hardened himself against Cupid and he won’t be able to get through to Strife.”
“Hmm,” Joxer murmured. He looked at Ares. Things were coming together for him now. He remembered Aphrodite’s words from so long ago. ‘Cupe’s arrows don’t really work on Gods for long. The God’s own powers, like, negate the effects after a few days. Not many people know that. And no Gods except me and Cupie, of course.’ Then there was the obvious guilt radiating off of Ares. The whole time he’d been telling the story, he had refused to look Joxer in the eye. And his grip on Strife had gotten tighter and tighter until Joxer was sure the god would have bruises tomorrow. It all came together.
“It wore off, didn’t it?” Joxer asked Ares in a quiet tone.
Ares flinched. This was it. The moment of truth. It would be a lot easier if Strife wasn’t in his lap, but he would make do. “Yes, it wore off. It actually wore off yesterday. Joxer, everything that has happened has been because I wanted it too. I have wanted you for years, but there was never an opportunity.”
“Never an opportunity!” Joxer yelled. “You’re my God! There was always an opportunity. Don’t you know I love you? That I’ve always loved you? How can you say you never had a chance?”
Ares didn’t have a chance to answer though as Joxer’s yell had woken Strife, and, in typical Strife fashion, he proceeded to freak. It was never good to make loud noises or sudden moves around the nervous godling and, true to form, Strife reacted. He jumped out of Ares lap, scared out of his mind, and flashed himself to the one place he felt safe.
He was very annoyed when he recovered from his fright and found himself snuggled tightly into a shocked, but very happy, Cupid’s arms. Arms that tightened and refused to let go when he tried to pull away.
Panicking, Strife began to struggle, frantically trying to get away from this person who had hurt him so much. Yet, even in the midst of his struggle, a tiny corner of his mind found it ironic that, in his fear, he’d gone to the one place that he’d ever felt truly safe. Which, strangely enough, turned out to be in the arms of the person who had hurt him more than anyone else ever had. Ironic, but humiliating as well.
Strife spared a second to hope that Ares would come and rescue him, but knew his uncle had his own issues to deal with; namely an angry Joxer. There would be no help coming. He was stuck here until Cupid decided to let him go. Mentally sighing in self-disgust, Strife stopped fighting to get free. Cupid’s arms, in response, tightened even more and Strife found himself pressed even closer to Cupid’s chest. This was not good.
Okay, it was good in the physical sense, but it wasn’t working any other way.
“Strife, what happened? Are you okay?” Cupid was torn between joy that Strife was here, sadness as the realization that Strife hadn’t meant to come to him, and worry over what had so obviously frightened Strife.
“Nothin’,” Strife muttered. Bracing himself and warning his heart that it was in for a little pain, Strife glanced up at Cupid. Bingo! The pain was right on schedule. But he was able to control it to the point where he could tell Cupid wasn’t buying his explanation. “Fine. Joxer yelled at Unc’ and I was sleepin’ and it woke me up and startled me and I freaked. ‘Kay?”
Cupid processed this. It sounded like Ares’ talk with Joxer wasn’t going so well. But he couldn’t worry about that now. He had Strife in his arms, unwillingly, but still there, and he wasn’t about to let go until he had a chance to explain and beg forgiveness. Glancing down, he saw black. Strife was refusing to look at him and all Cupid could see was hair.
Gently, he used a finger to tip Strife’s head up to his. Strife seemed to have given up fighting him as his head tipped up easily. Cupid couldn’t stop the groan that came from his mouth at the sight of Strife’s lifeless eyes, pale face, and tear tracks down his face. “Oh Gods, Strife,” Cupid whimpered.
“What?” Strife snapped. “Not enough pain for you? Well too bad ‘cause its all you’re gonna get from me. You’re just gonna have to be satisfied with it. Now, lemme go. I have work to do and you’re keeping me from it. I’m already behind ‘cause of. . . you,” Strife’s voice faltered on the last bit and he braced himself against the misery once again.
Cupid didn’t know what to say. But if Strife thought he was leaving, he needed to think again. Strife wasn’t going anywhere. Not yet at least. Setting his jaw, he easily stood up, Strife in his arms. Good thing his little godling didn’t weigh very much. He felt Strife tense but only tightened his arms around him a little more in response.
Cupid wasn’t looking forward to the next step, but this was an extreme situation and extreme situations called for extreme measures.
Cupid flashed the two of them to his bedchambers. The room had not been touched so the bedcovers were still rumpled and the room still smelled of sex. Cupid felt Strife flinch, but knew he couldn’t back down. This would be painful for both of them, but it had to be gone through. He just hoped Strife would realize he was telling the truth and wouldn’t leave him.
Being very careful not to loosen his grip, he sank down onto the bed, Strife still in his arms. Strife was beginning to panic now. Cupid could feel the pulse rapidly speeding up and the chest under his arms was heaving. Wrapping his legs around Strife’s, he used his powers to pull the covers up over them. Realizing Strife was looking at him like he’d gone insane, Cupid couldn’t help but smile. If Strife thought he was crazy now, wait until he saw what was happening next.
With both legs and arms wrapped around Strife, Strife wasn’t going anywhere. Carefully, Cupid let go of Strife with his left arm and snapped his fingers. Chains appeared in his hand and before Strife could say anything, those chains were wrapped around them. Both of them. Imprisoning them together.
Cupid settled back to wait for the reaction. He didn’t have to wait long. Strife lay there in shock for a few seconds then tried to jerk away. Cupid’s arms let him go easily enough, but the chains held firm. Trying to flash out of them, Strife realized he couldn’t. Hot on the heels of that realization was the knowledge that these were chains Hep had made.
“What are you doing?” Strife screeched. “These are Hep’s chains! Neither of us can get out of them. We’re both stuck!”
“I know. Now you have to listen to me and I have to listen to you.”
“You idiot! How are we supposed to get free? We can’t call for help.”
“Don’t have too. Mom’s gonna check on us from time to time and when I say too, she’ll let us go.”
“Oh, so this all depends on you. Fine. I’ll let you fuck me again. Now call ‘Dite and let me out of here.”
“No.”
“What!”
“This isn’t about the fucking, Strife. Although I’m looking forward to getting to that part when you’re ready for it again. This is about you and me and how we feel about each other. I’m sorry for the chains, I know how you hate to be locked in one place, but I couldn’t think of another way to get you to talk to me. And after you listen to me, really listen I mean, and if you still don’t want to be with me, then the next time Mom comes I’ll tell her to let you go.”
Strife looked at Cupid suspiciously. “Be with you? Why would I want to be with someone who was only playing a joke on me? And why do you insist on continuing it? I know all about your plan, Cupid. It’s over. You made a fool of me and got what you wanted. And that’s all I got to say on the subject.” And with that, Strife sat straight up on Cupid’s lap. Not a comfortable position, but he’d be damned if he would give in to Cupid. Cupid sighed. Looking at Strife, who was sitting rigidly on his lap, he wondered if this was the right course of action. He’d known getting Strife to listen would be difficult but. . .Cupid’s thoughts screeched to a halt as he took in Strife’s words. ‘Why would I want to be with someone who was playing a joke on me? And why do you insist on continuing it?’ Of course, Cupid thought to himself. Cupe, you really are an idiot. Strife has no idea you planned it to get close to him. He thinks it was all a big joke.
Cupid settled back with a sigh. He needed to explain everything. And he would. He would bare his soul to Strife and hope Strife would see the gesture for what it was, one of love, and not think it was a form of manipulation. Cupid began to talk.
“Okay, I know you hate me right now.” He ignored Strife’s snort. At least he was listening. “But I don’t hate you and I didn’t set out to hurt you. I made some mistakes and I am sorry for them. But I am warning you now, I am going to use every bit of knowledge I know about you to show you that I love you and that’s what this whole arrow thing has been about.”
Strife’s brain suddenly started paying attention. He loves me? Of course he doesn’t. Who would love a screw-up like you? He’s just trying to play more games with you. Inside, Strife began to cry. Why does everyone want to play with me? I don’t want to play anymore. Why does everything think it’s so much fun to hurt me?
But he couldn’t stop himself from listening to Cupid as he spoke.
“I admit, I planned the arrow and that it wasn’t real. Well, it was a real arrow, but there weren’t any love spells on it. Everything I did was done for one purpose.”
“Yeah, to teach me a lesson ‘bout messin with your stuff,” Strife muttered.
“No!” Cupid exclaimed. “It had nothing to do with that. I was glad you came to my place. It was just the opening I needed to get close to you. I’d been trying for years, but you’re awfully hard to pin down, you know.” Cupid grinned down at his cousin. Strife wasn’t looking at him, but Cupid could tell he was listening by the way he was sitting so still. He might have his eyes fixed on the wall, but his ears were fixed on Cupid.
Cupid sighed softly to himself. Nothing to do but keep talking. And praying. “Strife, I did plan it. The arrow was a set-up. But I just wanted you to get to know me and for me to be able to get closer to you. I thought we could become friends. I was hoping for more, and I was going to take every opportunity I saw to convince you that while friends would be great, lovers would be better.
And it was working! We were having fun. I know you were upset at first, but I tried to make it easier for you. I learned so much about you. Loved spending time with you, watching you as you slept, making you laugh was the best part of my day.”
Strife snorted. “Look, if ya wanna explain, do it already. Stop spoutin’ poetry. You ain’t impressing me.”
Cupid frowned. “You’re not making this very easy, you know,” he complained.
“Okay, that’s it,” Strife growled. Twisting around on Cupid’s lap to face him he let loose. “Listen here Flyboy! I am not here to make it easier on you to explain why you felt you had the right to make fun of me, trick me and humiliate me. I am not here to make it easier for you to salve your conscience about making me fall in love with you. Because you did. I loved you. I still love you. There! Are you happy now that I said it? Is the farce over?
How dare you bitch about me not helping you out here! You’re the one who hurt me and I’ll be damned if I make it easier on you!” Strife was breathing hard, his eyes flashed with fury and his face was flushed. Slowly he realized Cupid was not scared. Cupid was, in fact, smiling. Mentally, Strife groaned. Was there nothing that fazed this guy? He didn’t care about being caught in his lies and he didn’t care when Strife yelled at him. Was he normal? Maybe ‘Dite had dropped him as a kid or something. Or maybe it had something to do with the wings. Strife wasn’t sure. He was just so tired of hurting. When would ‘Dite get here?
Cupid tried to wipe the grin off his face, he really did. But he was just so happy. Strife had told him he loved him. Okay, so it had been yelled at him in the middle of an argument, but Strife had still said it. And he’d admitted that he still loved him. Cupid knew things were gonna be okay. But he still had some things to explain to his lover. Wrapping his arms around a once again rigid Strife, Cupid decided to continue the story. He wanted to finish it in time for Strife to have some time to think it over before mom got here.
“I set the entire thing up with the purpose of getting close to you. Mom wasn’t too thrilled, but when I showed her in the Halls of Time all the times I’d tried to get you to talk to me before and the way you ignored me, she realized that I was serious. This was the only way for me to get your attention. So she helped me out. The arrow didn’t have any love spells on it, it was just a plain arrow. And may I say I never realized how much getting hit with one hurt! Damn thing smarted for days.” Cupid rubbed his side in remembrance and missed Strife’s slight grin at his last remark.
“I planned on taking things slow, drawing it out, and then, when you had fallen in love with me, I would have told you all about the arrow. But things didn’t work out that way. I accidentally shot Dad and he grabbed Joxer so there was that mess to deal with. Although I didn’t think it would have gone on for so long,” Cupid mused quietly. Hmm, he should check on that after things with Strife were settled. Ares had been spelled a little bit longer than normal. And he needed to explain to Joxer what had happened too.
“Things just spiraled out of control. I thought I had everything worked out but I lost it when I heard you and Joxer. I know you were just joking, but I couldn’t help it. My jealousy is really bad and I couldn’t control it. I wanted to wait to make love with you until after you knew the truth, but I couldn’t stop myself. It’s not an excuse, but it’s what happened.
Since I had slept with you without telling you, I called Mom to see if she would come over. I was going to tell you this morning. That’s why Mom was there. I knew you’d be angry and upset so I wanted her there so she could tell you that I do love you, that it wasn’t a joke. I would never do that to anyone, but especially not you.
We were laughing about how pathetic I was, that I had to use a fake arrow to get you to even realize I existed in a more than “someone to play jokes on” type of way. It is kind of funny, you know. The God of Love can’t even get the attention of the one he’s in love with.
And that’s what happened. I set it up, yes, but I didn’t use you.” Cupid finished his tale. Would it be enough?
Strife processed what Cupid said. It made sense and it was believable. And if it wasn’t true, Cupid wouldn’t have tried so hard to make him listen. But that last remark…Strife twisted around to face Cupid. “Yes, you did use me. Don’t you see that you did? You twisted my emotions around; you played on my fear that I had hurt you. You did use me. You didn’t think you were, but you did.”
His words were cut off as Aphrodite flashed in. “Well,” she said, looking at Cupid and Strife hopefully. She really wanted this to work out.
Strife didn’t look at Cupid. “I think I’d like to go now,” he said quietly. Cupid’s arms tightened convulsively around him, but then they fell away. He had promised, after all. Aphrodite’s face fell, but she unlocked the chains. Strife hastily got up, avoiding Cupid’s gaze, which he could feel on his back, willing him to turn around and say he wasn’t really leaving. He heard Aphrodite whisper “I’m sorry” to Cupid, but then he flashed away and heard no more.
Cupid stared silently at the spot where Strife had just been standing. He was gone. Really gone. Not coming back. He had lost. Gradually, Cupid became aware of his mom’s arms around him. He looked up at her in shock. “Oh, Cupie, I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
“I think I’m gonna go for a walk,” Cupid muttered. He flashed out, leaving a distraught Aphrodite behind.
/////
Not really wanting to be alone, Strife went to see Ares and Joxer. He hoped they had gotten their argument worked out. He felt like he had a responsibility to Joxer. The mess was all his fault after all. And he hoped things had gone better with them than his had with Cupid.
Flashing in, he saw something he’d never expected to see. Ares and Joxer were on Ares throne; cuddling. Strife smiled. At least they had been able to work things out. About to leave, he was halted by Joxer’s cry. “Strife, wait up.”
He turned to see Joxer wriggle out of Ares lap and bound over to him. “Got a minute?” he asked Strife.
Bemused, Strife nodded. Joxer took his arm and led him out to the garden. It always surprised people that Ares had a garden. Strife didn’t know why. Ares appreciated beauty. He just found some things beautiful that others didn’t. Like, well, massacres. But flowers were cool too. Just not pink or yellow ones.
“So, since you’re here, I guess you weren’t able to work things out with Cupid?” Joxer asked. At Strife’s questioning look Joxer replied, “Ares told me.”
Strife shrugged. He didn’t want to talk about Cupid. “It doesn’t matter. I see you and Unc’ worked things out.”
Joxer beamed. “Yeah, he explained, I yelled, he sat there in shock, then I kissed him and we’re okay.”
Strife snickered at the chain of events as Joxer described them. The mortal would be good for Ares. He had a bizarre sense of humor like Strife’s. And now Joxer could worry about how to keep Ares entertained when he got bored; which was fairly often. Of course, that would leave Strife out in the cold. Again. But Ares would be happy and so would Joxer, so that would make it okay. It’s not like he didn’t have his own temple or followers to order around.
“Look, you don’t have to listen to me. I know I’m just a mortal. But Cupid wouldn’t have planned the arrow if he could have thought of another way to get your attention. He and I have had a lot of run-ins and I know he wouldn’t have set out to hurt you.”
“It’s not the arrow, Joxer. He used me. He manipulated me. Its my emotions, they’re all fucked up,” Strife muttered. Why he was telling Joxer this, he didn’t know, except that he’d always liked the guy. Joxer caused more mischief by breathing than any of his worshippers did on purpose.
“Is it worth it though?” Joxer questioned him.
Strife looked at him. Was what worth it? He didn’t understand what Joxer was getting at.
“You love Cupid. He loves you. He set the whole thing up to get you to the point where he could tell you he loved you. All I’m saying is he hurt you. But it was an accident. And now you’re hurting him. Not because you want too, but because you think you have to. You think you can’t give in because you’re the God of Mischief and you have a rep to maintain. But all you’re doing is depriving yourself of the person you love and can make you happy. So what I’m asking is, do you want to be miserable for the rest of your life because of your pride or do you want to go to Cupid, listen to him apologize, accept it and be with him where you know you belong?”
///
Strife thought. And thought. Then he thought some more. Pride was a definite issue here. Joxer had been right. He thought about his uncle and Joxer. Ares had done the same thing Cupid had really. He had tricked Joxer. But Ares had swallowed his pride and told Joxer the truth. Joxer had also forced his pride away and accepted what Ares had done. They were happy together.
Cupid had told him the truth. He had humiliated himself and told Strife the entire plan. But Strife hadn’t swallowed his pride. He had left. And he was miserable. And Cupid was miserable. They were both miserable.
But they had been happy once. Before the truth had come out. And now that the truth was free, you would think they would be happy again. Only they weren’t. Because of pride. More specifically, because of his pride. But could he do it? Could he go to Cupid and ask for a second chance?
Strife conjured up a scrying pool and looked for Cupid. He was at one of ‘Dite’s orgies. But he was just standing in a corner. A dark corner. When someone approached him, he would scowl and glare menacingly until that person found someone else to fool around with. He didn’t look very happy. He made the pool disappear and looked at his own reflection in the mirror. He didn’t look very happy either.
/////
Cupid trudged into his bedroom. He was so far beyond depressed it wasn’t even funny. Aphrodite had actually sent him home from the orgy saying he was ruining the mood. Well, excuse him for being upset. The man he loved hated him. Cupid figured he had a right to be upset.
He didn’t bother with lights or anything, simply stripped away his clothes with a thought and fell onto the bed. He got the shock of his life when arms crept around him. Rearing up, he thought the lights on and saw a face he’d never expected, but never stopped hoping to see, looking up at him.
“Strife,” Cupid whispered. Shock did not even begin to cover his emotions. “What are you doing here?”
Strife swallowed. This was the end of the line. He hoped this worked. “Apologizing,” he whispered.
“What do you have to apologize for? I’m the one who screwed up.”
“No, you told me the truth and I couldn’t handle it. I left you when all I wanted was to stay. So here I am. Now. I hope I didn’t miss the expiration date.”
“You’re serious,” Cupid said. “You really want to be with me?”
Strife nodded. “So did I?”
“Did you what?” Cupid asked.
“Miss the expiration date?”
Cupid chuckled. “After all this, you think I could possibly stop loving you? There is no date, Strife. I have you and I’m not letting go. And just to make sure…Strife, will you marry me?”
Strife blinked. And blinked again. “You’re serious?”
Again, Cupid chuckled. “Deja vu,” he said, referring to the question he had asked Strife before. “Yes, I’m serious. I love you, I want you, and I want to wake up next to you every morning. So will you?”
Strife felt his last doubts flow away. Cupid would never take a joke this far. He really did love him. And Strife certainly returned that love. “Yeah, Cupid, I’ll marry you. Gladly.”
As Cupid leaned forward to kiss him, Strife moved away. “Cupid?”
“Hmm,” Cupid murmured. He was busy trying to get Strife to stop squirming so he could kiss him properly.
“You gotta do one thing for me though.”
Cupid looked at his soon to be husband. “What?”
“You gotta stop letting your mom do your decorating!” Strife exclaimed.
Cupid blinked in shock. Then he started to laugh. Loudly. “Deal!” he managed to choke out. “Now come here and let me kiss you.”
Strife smirked. “What’ll it get me?” he asked teasingly.
Cupid said one word but it was enough to move Strife back into his arms where he belonged.
“Me.”
That was enough for Strife.