This short, dark piece is my first attempt at fanfic
of any kind. Please be gentle.
********************
Title: Joxer Loves
Author: A. Welshman
Rating: R
Pairing: None
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: All members of the Greek Pantheon belong
to history.
Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, and these representations of
the Greek
Pantheon belong to the makers of X:WP and H:TLJ. This
story (as well
as student debt) belongs to me.
Notes: angst, child abuse, implied rape, bad language.
This is my
first attempt at fan-fiction ever, and I would
appreciate your
*constructive* criticism.
{}-memory, **-thought
Summary: Children always want to believe that their
parents love
them. What does this do to their adulthood?
"Mama loves me."
{"Shut up, you stupid little brat!" she hisses as she
slaps him
across the face. The three-year old stops crying and
begins to
sniffle while she continues.
"The only reason you weren't left for the wolves is
because of me!
You can by the Gods act grateful!" With that, the tall
woman yanks
the child from the ground and flings him into a small,
dark closet
before slamming the door and latching it shut.
The little boy continues to whimper and rock back and
forth as he
cradles the burnt hand his mother had thrust into the
pot of boiling
water. It was his fault; he shouldn't have peed the
bed while he
slept.
*Mama love me, * he thinks, over and over, as he waits
for his mother
to return.}
---
"Papa loves me."
{As the man stands and starts tying up his breeches,
he snarls down
at the boy, "While your whore of a mother is bleeding,
you'll take
her place. And you'll do so every month from now on.
You're no good
for anything else, and I'll kill you if you tell
anyone."
Spitting at the quiet six-year old on the pallet, he
says, "Clean
yourself, boy, I'll be back tonight."
After a few minutes, the boy stiffly raises himself
off the pallet.
Gingerly pulling on his largest set of breeches, he
slowly makes his
way to the bathing room. As he starts to pat away at
the blood, he
quietly whispers the same words, over and over: "Not
here, not real,
Papa loves me. Not here, not real, Papa loves me."}
---
"Gabby loves me."
{The awkward young man in ridiculous, ill-fitting
armor is mooning
after the blonde woman striding ahead of him when he
trips over a
bump in the dirt path and knocks her into the fresh
pile of dung left
by their leader's war-horse. She immediately begins
shrieking while
scrubbing her face with her skirt hem. As soon as most
of the dung
has been scraped off (or spread in a thin layer across
her face), she
begins beating the man with her staff.
"You stupid, clumsy, ignorant, smelly, stupid OAF! How
could you be
so FUCKING stupid all the time?!"
Done beating the man, the blonde woman stalks off
after the sound of
running water beyond the nearby turn in the path.
Their dark-haired
leader turns her horse and tells the man, "You stay
here while she
washes in the stream up ahead." Without waiting for a
response, she
wheels her horse and proceeds down the path, following
the blonde.
"Okay, I'll wait here until you come get me," says the
man, quietly,
as he watches the women turn the bend. He moves to the
side of the
path, and sits under a tree while thinking, `Gabby is
as mad as Mama.
Gabby must love me, too!' And with that happy thought,
he grows still
and waits.}
---
"Ares loves me."
{The fireball blasts the bruised and bleeding man into
a marble
pillar, where he feels his shoulder blade and some
ribs break.
A larger, dark-haired man walks from behind the black
altar, sneering
at the broken man. "You have never been good enough to
be one of my
warriors, you aren't good enough now to be one of my
warriors, and
you never will be good enough to be one of my
warriors. You're
worthless for anything I could use you for, and maybe
NOW you'll go
away!" With a final kick to the fallen man's chest,
the dark man
disappears.
Feeling more broken ribs and a punctured lung, and
falling into
unconsciousness, the dying man's last thoughts are *He
hurts me
almost as much as Papa did. I'm glad he loves me so
much.*}
---
"I love Joxie. He's only about three, and he sleeps
most of the time,
but I keep him safe, and he loves me too."
"I know, Joxer, and I've made sure that this part of
the Fields is
just for you and Joxie. No one will hurt Joxie or you
ever again."
"Okay. Thank you, Hades."
End